Euphoria

MOVED!

2009-03-29T11:30:00.002+08:00

http://www.x-pialidocious.blogspot.com

out from under

2008-12-09T23:19:00.005+08:00

19 and... ain't gettin' any younger, love.

P/s: I couldn't thank you people enough for the mild yet, lovely celebrations, wishes and, presents. 19 is a tad too old for a massive birthday party, don't you think so? Lol, considering the fact that i already had mine when i was sweet 17 back then in '06. Ah, memoriesssss... ♥

Britney Spears's Circus Album is a must-buy whilst, Twilight Movie's a must-watch. (!!!)
Ok... random much? Lol.

[Note]
The vibe to blog is fading to an absolute nothingness - 0% probably? :/
Hence, the expected abandonment yet another time; for the entire month.

Hopefully.
[//Note]

Fyi, i'm living my blessed life to the utmost. :]
Much thanks especially to those that mattered.

live your life

2008-11-18T10:36:00.008+08:00

I used to be indecisive but now, i'm just not sure. :/

I have got to start on my assignments today or time will just flew by fast, ain't giving me any mercy at all. Period. So, where; Woodlands Civics Centre's Library perhaps? Can't believe i am still considering that option. Face the actual fact Azimah, where other place could you possibly know how to go to, right? -.-" Lol, how i pity myself... And seriously, i need some fresh air out of this house please and, thank you. (!)

P/s: I know i might sound -insertwhatever"evil"wordshere- but, i honestly cannot stand another minute of my own _____ monotone/expressionless face. If that should be the way every single time, you might as well don't even look at me, AT ALL. (!) 'Cause i swear i'm going to rip out your eyeballs off its sockets... whatever if i caught you rolling it especially at me again, red-handed. Once or twice, i can understand but, thrice? I think it is indeed about time to stop, aye? So much for having a "family" here in this world to help guide me through life. Pfft, irritants. :@

I'm a changed person should you not notice judging from the fact that i am still keeping calm right now despite all. Alhamdulillah. Hehe. Or perhaps, changing? Oh, not another contradiction. -.-"

Tomorrow's yet another MCS training. I extremely hate the crying part to the deepest core. But, i heard it's going to be Watak dan, perwatakan. Bottom line is; I'm going to be ok, right? I'll pull through it like the way i did many times before. *hoping. Furthermore, both of my calves's cramps are getting better. I am able to run again. (!) Lol, whatever eh. And, i'm missing Nizaruddin in MCS already despite such unwanted reality drama he created then. Do you? :[

Ok, i think i should go bathe now, get dressed and, get my engine started already. Goodness Azimah, STOP WASTING TIME! Wake up, wake up, wake up! I'm thinking; I pity my future children, i really do...

'Til other times, lovelies!
P/p/s: I miss my baby Azri... boohoo. :'[

enlightened

2008-11-17T12:14:00.013+08:00

Ain't getting any younger, love.

My hair's a tad longer; great news? Lol! -.-" Hey, it's been a couple of years people and, like FINALLY, i could tie and, style my ever-so-messy hair up in any possible way that i wanted to. I am such a happy goober but, i still can't deny the fact that long hair do irritates me to the deepest core. And just so you know, this is such a huge sacrifice i am willing to make especially for my beloved one&only, Muhammad Khairul Azri Bin Abdul Ghafar. I should seriously congratulate and, please myself for that. Lol, that sounds so wrong but, heck. Moving on...

H2 Kesusasteraan; 25 synopsis for 25 chapters in the novel, "Restu".
H2 Bahasa; Research of unlimited kosa-kata based on categories.
H2 MOB; Question 7, 5-Year Series.
H1 Mathematics; Holiday worksheets.

Assignments. (!!!) Sighs. Negligence, procrastination etc shouldn't be made into mere excuses any longer. It's A-levels for goodness sake and, I or perhaps all JC&MI-ians need an extreme wake up call for good realisation purposes. Defending my part however, i guess i'm just too caught up with my tight schedules this holiday that i hardly had any time to spare at least some thoughts for it, especially revision-wise. But, i never stop trying. It is indeed, about time to get my engine started. :[

Ok, that aside. I have to confess that my holidays had been exceptionally fun so far. A lot of quality time spent with Azri and, friends; rented a car for the past two days, supposed bbq-ing etc. I also, had been going back and, forth to school lately for MCS's activities which is tiring and, time-consuming but, satisfactory though. Not forgetting the upcoming MCS's camp and pot-luck gathering this December at my dear, Azri's crib blablabla... schedule's extremely packed, aye? Oh well, that's just life and, i'm livin' it. *winks ;]

I couldn't care less anymore about family issues. Period.
And, did i mention that i'm changing for the better? Heehee. :]

It's funny no matter how many times i decided to close this blog of mine down, i'll always encounter the sudden "urge" to share thereafter. Just give me several days later and, i'll leave this blog unattended/not updated again. Perangai kan? Why, why, why... oh, why? Random, much? :S

I AM CRAVING FOR MORE PICTURES!

Got to go now; calling, calling. *big grin

true, to only you

2008-10-30T20:20:00.003+08:00

i ain't going nowhere; you know, i never could. :'[

oh, the nerves

2008-10-28T14:46:00.016+08:00

for what it's worth; beyond the world, to the end of time. ♥

cehdebah, macam gambar kahwin lah pula. -.-"

way overdue Hari Raya Aidilfitri '08(specifically: 18/10/2008)'s pictures featuring my all-time favourite folks whom i love truckloads, out there. enjoy...;

and they love to take pictures of us, nur@zri. lol! :]

i realised that something is very wrong with my eyes but, heck. it has always and will forever be a very big deal/issue to me anyways. :S

on a further random note however, i seriously mean it when i say i love these people to the deepest core for they're indeed my best of friends, ever. well, why not? tak cerewet, tak banyak songeh, tak dengki-mendengki, forever fun and hyped up bunch of hooligans resulting in a pretty much unbeatable camaraderie among us all. we merely just go with the flow and, that's the way FRIENDS should be. ~~ouch, anyone?~~ :]

believeeeee me, there's more to this actually but, i decided to pick and, choose the best out of it all. furthermore, photobucket sucks big time. period.

here's 08A4 and, 08A4's only, may i emphasise on this, Hari Raya Aidilfitri '08(specifically: 19/10/2008) pictures.

there's more supposedly but i am just too lazy to upload everything. :[

i love each and, every single one of them(especially my usual cliques; you know who you are :]) except for 1 ~~freaking, psycho *****, in my opinion~~. one word; successful. itu pun dah Alhamdulillah lah sangat-sangat eh takde orang bikin perangai over Niza and the gang's(my cliques too who are not part of 08A4 unfortunately, just so you know) presence or else... enough said.

who knew

2008-10-17T20:10:00.011+08:00

MISUNDERSTANDINGS!
MISUNDERSTANDINGS!

apparently, there's only 2 who disagrees but, many other's names being mentioned and, used for their own selfish needs whatever that is to the extent of boycotting etc. therefore, it's pretty obvious for our(Nishaa's and mine as well) impulsive explosion yesterday despite having almost 90% of them(especially the H1 Malay students) being innocent and knows, absolutely nothing about all of these. there's none to be blame actually but still hereby, i would like to apologise publicly here for whatever that had happened. it's unintentional mainly, effusive that's all. :'[

p/s: for the two(names are not mentioned so, do not assume please), you ought to feel very sorry for yourself and, especially to the others seriously. that's all i'm saying. :/

*coughssiapayangmakancili,diayangterasapedasnyacoughs*

so, everything'll move on as per normal. this Sunday, 19/10/2008. here are the entirely changed plans we(Zati and, me who actually took the initiative) managed to come up with thus far;

transport: an exact 23-seat bus
(hourly charges has yet to be confirmed though)
starting point: Nuriah's house, Jurong West
(we decide to start off from here mainly for the sake of Eve who's most probably going to be late and she lives somewhere around there as well)
$$$ for the entire day: approximately $12 each per person

NO OUTSIDERS ARE ALLOWED!

should there still be any disagreements, kindly please voice it out at my tagboard and we'll try to find other alternatives to suit everyone's best interests while we still can. :]

and Zati, thank you so much for the efforts and, i really appreciate your company just now. i really need that. aku heart kau, babe. ♥

oh well, i guess, we're gonna pretend.

survivor

2008-10-16T19:57:00.009+08:00

there is too much to do with hate but, much more to do with love.

as i've had promised, mid-October it is and i'm back. miss me much? (ew, lol!) life has yet to pardon me any mercy. the thought of having time flew pass by me at a rate that's totally out of my league, irks me to the deepest core! CCA is so not helping, please. just so you know, i'm caught up with my tight schedules this coming holidays and, i am not at all happy about it for i do feel that personal space is essential(highly opinionated, by the way). still, this is only the beginning. i can't possibly whine my way out of it all. :/

i got to be strong and, stand tall.
i'll fight my way, through it all.

it's funny how tons of words are playing around in my head right now desiring to be written but, i can't seem to put it all in words. maybe, just maybe that some things are better off left unsaid. true? all i can say is; inevitable mistakes are made, noted, learned and i could only love him more, nothing less. i'll stay true to you sayang, for as long as it takes. ♥

ikrar kita mengharungi badai sakti, mencari sinar kasih suci.
walaupun nafasku ini pasti terhenti.

jangan pula ada sangsi lubuk hati, percaya cinta tiada ganti.
kau yang ku cari, kaulah kasih, hingga ke akhir hayat nanti.

yes, my promotional examinations are indeed over(YAHOOOOO!). however so, the await for 'the moment of truth' that determines our fate, especially in MI(be it promoted/advanced/expelled etc.); Monday, 20/10/2008 Pre-U 1 Promotional Exercise+Results is making me devastatedly depressed. please oh please get this over and, done with A.S.A.P 'cause these feelings are uber annoying.

in order to relieve the unnecessary thoughts out of our heads, savoring our moments together while we still can seems like a better option. hence;

an outing and, Eagle Eye together the last two days with my bunch of hooligans! food was great, movie was awesome yet, unbeatable and company was fantabulous. we should do this more often, yes? more pictures... :]

there are more people supposedly but these pictures consists of mainly the 'muka-tak-tahu-malu's. lol! ~~not forgetting, regarding 08A4's Raya Outing this Sunday, 19/10/2008;~~

[read]

~~CONFIRMED!~~
expected number of people: 27-30
transport: a 30-seat bus, $45/hour
expected journey: 12 hours long, MAXIMUM!

Hafiza's father will help us pay half of the amount. much thanks, Hafiza. :] NOTE: PRIOR TO THAT, EVERYONE MUST BRING ALONG AT LEAST $12/PERSON FOR THE LEFTOVERS. outsiders are allowed but, not too many of them. so far, there's only 4 of them noted and that's acceptable. should there be any changes, i'll keep you guys updated here in my blog for i'm GEP-ing(which equates to not coming to school, duh) this Thursday and Friday. hehe. ^^

p/s: tolong jangan ada yang back out last minute eh, please. aku cekik-cekik batang leher korang.

~~KORANG BOLEH PERGI MAMPUS SANA, SATU-SATU PERANGAI MACAM SIAL!~~

i'll take that back.

[/read]

anyways...

Gifted Education Programme(GEP), my work attachment, prompts me to be one of the invigilators(assistant officer aka. runner to be specific :]) for these 'gifted' primary 3 student's test for two days. formal clothing, act like a teacher(an occupation i've always dreamed of), walk around, screen coding etc. ... easy money, i must say-$$$-. this is besides the fact that i was posted all the way to Opera Estate Primary School which costs me $24 for a taxi ride from Sembawang this morning, of course. FREAKING FAR LAH THAT PLACE! :'[

and, i could only;

sighs. lol!
ok, merepek. 'til other times, lovelies! ^^

ever, ever after

2008-09-04T21:21:00.012+08:00

happy 32nd, love. ♥

it's amazing how these feelings never seems to fade, that it'll only grow stronger at each passing seconds of my everyday. despite sharing 8 years of friendship, 2 years 8 months of unconditional passion, devotion and, commitment towards each other thus far, i still have yet to learn and spell the word; b.o.r.e.d.o.m in our entire relationship's dictionary. fyi, we still have got the you-hang-up-no-you-hang-up kind of love and, i couldn't be more thankful for it's such littlest things that makes me believe; 32nd and beyond, my dear. we're able to unite for ever, ever after. :]

tomorrow'll be yet, another awesome experience for us.
aku sungguh tak sabar nak berbuka puasa dengan sayangku, Azri. ^^

should you not know, this is what i've been spending my last 2 days with. 100% created by the newly appointed Millennia Institute's PERBAYU 'Head Of Publicity' - ME! sempat-menyempat eh, i tahu... lol! mind you, it's pure hard work that i've had to sacrifice almost 80% of my scheduled revision time(preparations for the upcoming end-of-year examinations), supposedly. although i hate to admit this but, here's a sincere confession; i am so easily distracted/addicted with computers. in other words that is to say, i'll be doomed yet, satisfied at the same time and that's obviously very risky. bagus kan aku. :/

therefore,

REMINDER: TIME-MANAGEMENT!

or, i'll be dead meat.
it's my very own choice, afterall. :[

[edit]

REVISION!
~~H1 Mathematics~~
~~H2 Management Of Business~~
~~H2 Principles Of Accounting~~
H2 Malay/Kesusasteraan
~~H1 General Paper~~

[//edit]

behold my Friendster's horoscope; "there is a strong need for you to clean your emotional house. leave the past behind." for only Allah knows why, it scares me to my very guts. this horoscope's bullshit can be extremely true sometimes, aye?

and, Mr "1-year" guy etc, this life couldn't be more interesting. lol! :]

however so, despite all, this is not what i want but, it's what i have to do.

i'll be abandoning this blog again, until further notice(mid-October, perhaps?).
'til other times, lovelies. :]

over the rainbow

2008-08-28T19:39:00.006+08:00

a picture speaks a thousand words.
shall re-update, whenever i feel like it. :]

let loose

2008-08-27T17:42:00.005+08:00

take a break.
have a kit-kat.

ACES(skipping) today was fun!

i procrastinate every Wednesdays with my favourite girls like as if, we own the Students Activities Clubhouse(SAC) in Millennia Institute. our timetable evidently shows only one subject for the entire day therefore, what else do you expect?! alike what Nuriah always claim, "kita bayar school fees, babe. apa lagi... lepak ah!" lol! -.-"

-Azimah.Nuriah.Sakinah-

Nishaa and Hanaan tak sporting ah.
told you that your faces will be featured, righttttt? ^^

hari ini, kita tangkap mood. hujan lebat, satu-satu sumbat lagu jiwang pat telinga, emo-ing all the way. we sang our favourite ones together, out and aloud. (!) who cares about the others. afterall, i don't recall de-stressing being a sin of any sort. they should understand for we are all students alike. in fact, our "beautiful" voices turns out to be a lullaby instead 'cause many resorts to sleeping afterwards, including me. lol! -exaggerator-

2 tests tomorrow; i'll either make it or break it.
enough said and i shall end this post here, abruptly. :]

undying triumph

2008-08-26T20:42:00.009+08:00

love is like a piece of artwork.
even the smallest bit can be beautiful. ♥

although it was on the spur of the moment, the littlest surprise of having him hiding behind the staircase that leads to my two-storey high HDB flat this morning was indeed, a much bliss experience. honestly, i couldn't possibly wait for another weekend just to be with him. one word; torture! but as much as i hate to admit this, i love the way NS had changed him into a more disciplined, reliable and responsible man. even his ideology towards life has been made perfected as such; always think about the future. clearly, he knows exactly what he wants now and is definitely working uber hard for it. furthermore, he realised that being 19 himself, he ain't getting any younger hence, the positive attitude and all... i couldn't be more proud. wake up people, it's never too early. rest assured, i'll always be there supporting him, only if it's worth the encouragement of course. you wouldn't want me to support him for the wrong reasons like smoking/drinking etc, right? please, i know he deserves better than that. no offense, though. :]

right after we hugged, expressing our longing towards each other for a minute or two, off we head to Sembawang MRT Station together whilst talking as well, duh. i came to know the reason as to why he was back here from HTA on a Tuesday; he was hurrying for an interview in Novena at about 0815hr later then so, he decided to go home earlier beforehand and, be mentally prepared for it. fyi, this is the most exciting, relieving yet, interesting news for the week(well, to me at least -.-"). should you not know;

HE SIGNED ON(SOME TIME AGO) AND,
WAS FINALLY SHORTLISTED FOR TRAFFIC POLICE (!)

Traffic police's post is what he had always wanted and, dreamed for. besides being ultimately happy with that fact, being me, i tried to look at different perspectives too. should he get it and, be an official Traffic Policemen one fateful day(i am hoping and, will always hope for it to happen realistically :]), this simply means that his future is already determined, 100% guaranteed. even the starting pay of $1700 per month approximately seems not at all bad for a 19-year-old(with visions), aye? not to mention, civil servant's privileges as the foremost priority in the eyes of the government above all others including numerous sudsidies in every aspects, both my parents will eventually stop doubting his capabilities in guiding me and i'll be his one pampered, happy-goober girlfriend every single day(NOT!) etc... mind you, i am so not materialistic but still gee, i can't wait!

considering other factors however, there's nothing much to worry about since he already have a driving license in hand as well. wow! his determination to succeed simply inspires me to a very large extent. this makes me fall for him all over again... ^^

i'm confident that we're able to make it through whatever possible together, sayang. 31st and beyond; nothing can stop us now. ♥

p/s: congratulations! i am so, so proud and undeniably happy for you, my dear.
p/s/s: you know yourself that i love only you, none others.

sunset

2008-08-25T21:34:00.006+08:00

and, i carry the weight of the world on my shoulders.
with family and, crisis that only grows older.

an advance warning beforehand should do good for you, "brother-in-law"; there's a limit to practically everything, especially with effect to me and my sister's, including my family's patience as a whole. (!) don't you ever underestimate our capabilities into doing something very unexpected but, at all. you've said those typical words as of any particular unfaithful husbands would in this world once to my sister, therefore may i strongly suggest; never, ever should you repeat it again. with 3 bloody kids in hand, the least you could do is to think of their future well-being. you're 31 for goodness sake; it is indeed about time for you to act and think like one, pleaseeeee! and oh, much congratulations for making me hate you to the deepest core(fyi, record's officially broken). enough said. :@

just so you know, i was experiencing the lowest of lows yesterday. should you not notice, this was my MSN nickname then;

(W) Azimah - SEMUA CEKIK DARAH, PERANGAI MACAM SIAL!

p/s: pardon my offensive language please and, thank you. :] however so, despite the precautions given which couldn't be more obvious enough i supposed, there are still some people who are ridiculously thickskinned, aye? tsk3. just take a look at this anonymous "zai" person -???!!!- (100% uneditted);

(12:35 PM) zai: ello
(12:35 PM) zai: care 2 chat beb?
(12:36 PM) zai: ?

(12:43 PM) (W) Azimah has changed his/her status to Online.
(1:25 PM) zai: eu dere?
(1:25 PM) zai: azimahhhhh

(1:26 PM) zai just sent you a nudge.

(1:27 PM) zai: ???

(1:30 PM) zai just sent you a nudge.

(1:30 PM) zai: sombong pe?

(1:30 PM) zai is now Offline
(1:32 PM) zai just sent you a nudge.

clearly, i chose not to entertain. tapi masih tak faham-faham bahasa juga budak ini... darah up seh! his continuous nudging eventually irritates me like crazy to the extent that i could seriously not take it any longer, resorting me to respond his expected ridiculous questions in such a manner. read;

(1:33 PM) Azimah: nak apa?!
(1:33 PM) Azimah: i'm not in the mood

(1:33 PM) zai: mood for?

(1:33 PM) Azimah: not obvious enough is it?

(1:33 PM) zai: just chat je
(1:33 PM) zai: wats the matter?

(1:33 PM) Azimah: who are you to know?

(1:34 PM) zai: jus a concern fren

(1:34 PM) Azimah: friend: "BANGBROS"?!
(1:34 PM) Azimah: masalahnya sekarang: LELAKI
(1:34 PM) Azimah: i hate even the slightest sight of them
(1:34 PM) Azimah: they irks me and, you're one of them kan?!
(1:35 PM) Azimah: aku takde mood

(1:35 PM) zai: lol seems u have bf issues

(1:35 PM) Azimah: jadi jangan kacau

(1:35 PM) zai: am i rite?

(1:35 PM) Azimah: why are you so ignorant?!
(1:35 PM) Azimah: tak faham bahasa eh?!

(1:36 PM) zai: ala jus wana get to knw ya better

(1:36 PM) Azimah: for?!
(1:36 PM) Azimah: sex?! <-----(i have my goddamn reasons as to why i said this!)

(1:36 PM) zai: nah

(1:36 PM) Azimah: ABIH?!

(1:36 PM) zai: friendship

(1:36 PM) Azimah: kau yang lelaki takde topik lain nak berbual kan?!
(1:36 PM) Azimah: SEX SEX SEX 24/7!

(1:37 PM) zai: LOL

(1:37 PM) Azimah: pergi kacau perempuan lain!
(1:37 PM) Azimah: KELAKAR KAPE?!
(1:37 PM) Azimah: cari gaduh ah kau ni

(1:37 PM) zai: relax...
(1:37 PM) zai: wats ya age?

(1:38 PM) Azimah: I AM SO SICK OF THESE QUESTIONS!!!!!

(1:38 PM) zai: skoolin or workin?

(1:38 PM) Azimah: eh fuck, aku malas nak layan kau ok
(1:38 PM) Azimah: bye

oh, and it doesn't stop there. the "fun" only begins here;

(1:39 PM) zai: sial
(1:39 PM) zai: wat did i do man?
(1:39 PM) zai: did i do anything to u?

(1:40 PM) Azimah: KAU PENGACAU YANG TAK BERMUNASABAH!
(1:40 PM) Azimah: kalau nak berbual pun
(1:40 PM) Azimah: biar ada asasnya
(1:40 PM) Azimah: tak habis2 tanya umur, sekolah ke, kerja ke
(1:40 PM) Azimah: lepas itu
(1:40 PM) Azimah: spit/swallow
(1:40 PM) Azimah: kau jangan merepek eh dengan aku
(1:40 PM) Azimah: aku betul2 tengah takde mood sekarang

(1:41 PM) zai: ok la i wont ask all tat
(1:41 PM) zai: happy?

(1:41 PM) Azimah: kalau nak buat kawan, buat dengan cara yang betul sikit
(1:41 PM) Azimah: kalau tak aku malas nak entertain
(1:43 PM) Azimah: yang kau ni asik tak habis2 kacau aku aje kenapa?
(1:43 PM) Azimah: apa kau nak?
(1:43 PM) Azimah: aku tak layan pun tak habis2 kacau
(1:43 PM) Azimah: huh?
(1:43 PM) Azimah: kau nak apa?

(1:43 PM) zai: nthin jus chat je
(1:43 PM) zai: unless u want ah
(1:43 PM) zai: haha

(1:44 PM) Azimah: kalau aku cakap aku tak nak pun kau insist kan?
(1:44 PM) Azimah: sampai nudge2 ni semua
(1:44 PM) Azimah: bingit seh
(1:44 PM) Azimah: darah up
(1:49 PM) zai: u want me to potong?
(1:49 PM) zai: if u were single i'll go for u... <-----(WTH-?!-)

thus, i immediately blocked him without even thinking twice. this guy's uber ridiculous; he doesn't even know the slightest bit about me and he claims that he... likes me?! just look at the way i talk to him. is it attractive but, at all?! goodness, is he crazy/blind/*insertwhateverhere* or something?! dorts lah eh. -.-"

as for my friends, i'm sorry on behalf of my Azri's attitude then, last Saturday. he wants to apologise personally if possible but unfortunately, he doesn't have any of your numbers so, Azimah-comes-to-the-rescue i guess? lol. i think he needs time to adapt to our way of communicating etc. it's indeed a big thing/change for him, okay? furthermore, his headache's so not helping considering the fact that he had to force himself to endure the draggy play and such just for me despite his condition. faham-fahamkan sahaja lah. deep down, i know that you guys still love him actually, righttttt with the concerns and all? tak payah nak tipu eh, Amal, Zati, Nuriah, Sakinah, Nishaa etc. lol! i love you people truckloads lah. biggggg hugs.

HE'S MY AZRI WHOM I LOVE MOST.
AND, HE'S SORRY.
:'[

seikhlas-ikhlasnya.
*roll eyes to you guys. lol!

10 words to summarise my past weekend: 70% COPYRIGHT OF MI'S KHILAF WAS DISAPPOINTING DESPITE THE PUBLICITY! :[ highly opinionated, by the way. the props however, deserves my full of praises and recognition though for it's the only thing which excites me most besides the character, 'Warjo'. ^^

p/s: i miss Azri! ♥
'til other times.

lucky number

2008-08-09T23:58:00.001+08:00

08/08/08 marks an undeniably, memorable date in mind. :]
therefore beware, long post ahead.

with the effect of having several occasions/events taking place in a single day itself is indeed, evidently obvious enough as to why i'd say likewise. behold these;

43rd National Day Celebration
do bear all of our random(or need i say, unnecessary?) pictures. lol!

(venue: multi-purpose hall
reason being: nothing better to do plus, show's uber boring to the core)

next,
Nuriah's Birthday Surprise

HAPPY 20^TH BIRTHDAY, NURIAH SWEETHEART!

siapa dah tuaaaaa? lol!

wish you all the very best in your future endeavours, alright?
and... enjoy your 20^th to the fullest, babe! :]

next(again -.-"),
Miss Hong's Birthday Surprise

HAPPY 25^TH BIRTHDAY, MISS HONG!

i don't really fancy her that much but, oh wells; Happy Birthday! :]
no well wishes, lol!

jahatnyaaaaa.
aku memang, kalau dah tak suka, mati-mati aku tak akan suka.

that's me. :]

as for the many other random yet, unnecessary pictures again, here it goes;

(venue: #01-01, 08A4's classroom
reason being: tunggu birthday girl tua bangka lambat sangat, lol)

last but not least,
1st Class Outing - To Town

after which, i met Azri, my babylove to tag along with us. ♥

MELAYU SELALU JIWA, BEB!
lol! i cannot talk like this lah, it sounds so funny.

just fyi, i thrust all of my exhaustion for the week aside immediately as soon as i step, one foot in my school then to let all the fun seep right through my veins from the very start of the day(alike a much needed de-stressing therapy, i guess). i swear, never did i ever felt so relieved!

fun, fun, fun!
and, i absolutely love the bond in 08A4. :]!

coolness.

and today's live fireworks preview with dear Azri is lovely, indeed. besides the fact that we just had to be surrounded by bangla gays all around us, laughing at them makes our day seems even more interesting. just so you know, the sight of them simply irks me like, ewwwww!

i can't believe i had spent eons typing this post which i did, literally.
this is so not me.

2 minutes to midnight, time to cuddle up.
sweet dreams, netizens. :]

p/s: i've the urge to change my blog's skin yet, again. sighs. -.-"

and i said, life's like moving mountains.
should you stop, you'll lose.

31st

2008-08-04T22:46:00.009+08:00

absence sharpens love, presence strengthens it.
p/s: i love you Azri, to the deepest core. ♥

proper update shall wait.
for everything's as close-to-perfect right now.

keep being yourself, Azimah; nonchalant as ever.
there's not a need to impress basically anyone but, at all.

let's merely, go slow.
and, enjoy every passing seconds of life.

as for them pitiful haters: whateverrrrr bitches.
should you not know, i love all of my enemies; it pisses them off. hah! :]

d.a.m.a.g.e.d

2008-08-02T23:09:00.003+08:00

i've been walking in the same way as i did,
missing all the cracks in the pavement. :'[

wildcard

2008-07-24T21:48:00.011+08:00

finally, i could spare at least some time to actually care for an update. many things had happened undeniably for the past week(s) or so but unfortunately, time just keeps running out. my schedule's rather tight with tons of homeworks, projects and such piling up... believeeeee me, it'll never stop. furthermore, end of year promos is drawing very near. the pressure is indeed overwhelming and, i'm ultimately shagged prior to that. oh yes, i am. but, i've got to stop whining and function more instead. this is reality for goodness sake, Azimah; face it! urgh, irritants. :'[

MONDAY, 21 JULY 2008; RACIAL HARMONY DAY

oh, all the pretty people in school then. :]
a picture speaks a thousand words afterall and i've got plenty of them so, enjoy.

beloved 08A4's lunatics.

Nithiya.

Renuka.

Arif Nur Hakim.
mohawk with a jubah?! lol.

Christine.

ever-so-sensitive Muhammad Masuri.
ala-ala hindustan.

Nur Hafiza with such coincidence.
now, who wears it better? lol.

♥ part of the kaki's (1) ♥

♥ part of the kaki's (2) ♥

keep the harmony people, for i strongly believe in peace. and, never should one trigger the beauty of it; chaotic atmosphere is an extreme loathe by the way, just fyi. :]

academic-wise, on the other hand, i heard that i topped the class?! lol. very unexpected but still; Alhamdulillah, syukur. Miss Hong(my form teacher), could even interrupt my Kesusasteraan lesson then with a surprise call just to say that she would belanja me for school's Transcendence this Saturday, as a reward for achieving 'excellent' results this semester(i mean, come on! it's only Mid Year Examination, -.-"). and since she bought two tickets for me altogether therefore, i have another one more, still pending/put on hold right now. anyone interested? lol. just so you know, my overall Mid Year Examination's results are still a mystery though and, the truth will only be revealed tomorrow at 0900hr approximately right in front of my parents during the meet-the-parents session. nervous much? you bet. i could only hope that everything goes well. meaning, no bad remarks/comments about me given by both of my teachers or i'll be dead meat for sure. :/

i'll post my result slip once i retrieve it tomorrow, alright?
that is, if i have the time. faham-faham sahajalah eh.

my dear Azri however, is not in a very good state. have you any idea how heartwrenching it is to see him that way? i believe he's experiencing a wee bit of concussion on his head due to being kicked quite hard i supposed, somewhere around his brain spot with a boot(read; boot!) during one of his training combats. he was unable to complete his fitness test(major headaches etc) today and, was sent home right after to go to a hospital which he did, by the way for a minor check-up. luckily, it's not that serious or fret not, i'll track down that accidental-kicker and kick his balls real hard to the extent that'll cause him choke to immediate death(exaggerator, -.-"). i bet he's already asleep right now but, i'll just let him be. he needs his rest, sufficient of it. :'[

p/s: i miss you so much, baby.
and get well soon, please. ♥

song in my head

2008-07-12T08:19:00.013+08:00

it's been a while now.
so, let me break the ice.

just so you know, i'm living a bliss at this very moment in time(GP project's issue aside, though; no thanks to Masuri -!!!-). everything's fine, everything turns out the exact way that i wanted it to and, i couldn't be more grateful. Alhamdulillah, syukur.

i'm absolutely proud to confess that my relationship with dearest Azri could not have been any better. honestly, i've never but, at all feel this much comfortable with someone before, ever in my 19 years of living thus far. undoubtedly, he changed a lot(positively, of course) and, he never fails to try to understand me and my ways deeper than the physicals. should you not know me, i am a very complicated girlfriend that most guys'd probably execrate the very presence of me; i'm a perfectionist, i know exactly what i want for life(and that includes my future partner's self nature/character as well) and, i have high expectations on basically every single thing that i came to know of to the very extent that even with strangers, i tend to wonder(and by this, i meant not judging!) what he/she's like as a person from what i see. yes, i am that pesky. lol. well, at least i'm not pampered/too clingy for his $$$$$, unlike some typical girls or should i say, materialistic bitches out there -.-"; like pestering him to get me something i desire/crazed for etc. i've never done that and, i definitely won't. i know Azri's a little pressurised with all the demands that i lay on his broad shoulders but, he never gives up and i'm very much impressed by that. i know that this might sound so cliche' but; i really thank god that it's him i chose to be with, about approximately 2 1/2 years ago. 'cause despite his imperfections, believe it or not, he's the perfect boyfriend-material none other guy could ever meet. what's past is past and, let us let bygones be bygones. what matters is, now/the present. 30 and beyond, baby. we'll glide through thick and thin together. i love you. ♥

should you happen to read my Friday, 4th July 2008's post entitled 'Unwanted', i wrote something like this;

issues gives you tissues.

i can't wait for Azri's return this weekend. i need him very badly which, i don't even know why. he's my only medicine, the only one who could make me smile which i've yet to for the past two days. my mind's everywhere, my heart's jigsaw-puzzled and, i am not happy for some reason or another. i think ~~$$$$$/account book~~ or, both's the issue here. no wait, i think it's ~~my-umi's-batiks-that-have-yet-to-be-retrieved-since-months-ago~~ issue. but, then again, ~~corset's $$$$$~~ issue? ~~mid-year examination result's~~ issue? i don't know! there's just too many issues stuck here in my head. a therapy/spa treatment would be excellent, pleaseeeee. -.-"

mood-swinging. ~!@#$%^&*()

the ones that are striked off had all been settled and, my mind's freeeee! lol. not to forget, i withdrew from my further commitment as 'Ramlah'(the name of the character i was supposed to play) with Khilaf's production(an official theatre thingy, supposedly to act with big stars from Suria like; Mastura Ahmad and Abang Mok himself etc. i know, coolio... lol) due to some inevitable parent's dissentient, as usual. it's a waste, i know but still, i've got to respect. they're my parents afterall. oh well. :'[

and, mid-year examination results! lol. i know this is not a necessity but, it's just an update on what's happening in my life, for the week or whatsoever not. hence, these are my results that i've gotten thus far;

JENG, JENG, JENG
like, -.-"

H2 Principles Of Accounting: A
H2 Kesusasteraan: B(this is disappointing much, i tell you)
H1 Mathematics: A

just fyi, i topped two papers; H1 Mathematics, highest in class(tied with Amal since we got the same marks) as well as, H2 Kesusasteraan's paper part 2(that is Sastera, itself), highest for the whole cohort. and, Cikgu Mardiana just had to announce it during yesterday's MCS training in front of everyone. malulah aku. lol. but, thanks anyways and i've got to congratulate myself for achieving such results 'cause trust me, it ain't easy. and, i am not bragging just, spreading the joy. lol. MOB and GP's marks are still a mystery. i just hoped that i survived both. please, please, please don't dampen my spirit. :]

last but not least, i think i've got to make this very clear. ever since school starts, i think it's best if i'll only blog during the weekends(when i'm free, that is). so, may i officially declare that my blog's on;

semi-hiatus, to be specific.
'til other times. :]

p/s: i'm missing you so much. meet you later, baby. *kiss

//editted at 0845hr, 13th July 2008.

just a little update 'cause i think it's essential to me, at least? lol. :]

yesterday, i went out with Azri the whole day throughout. though our plan was all haywired initially due to some inevitable reasons(human beings are like ants during the weekends in Singapore, aye? they're everywhere and, damn irritating to the core!) still, we scuttled around Bugis to buy him new wardrobes; 3, to be specific. all suits him very well, i must say(tengok ah, siapa pilihkan, lol). then we head back to North, settled at Woodlands Civics Centre to do my piled up homeworks for the week together(fyi, this is our initial plan but too bad, National Library's super packed then);

H1 Mathematics: ~~assignment 4 qn. 2, 3, 4, 5, 8~~/~~graphing technique's worksheet~~
H2 Mangement Of Business: ~~research on 'small businesses'~~
IRP: 4 articles altogether(abandoned since months ago, lol)

IRP file check's next week and, i panicked. i hate essays! even if i had said this for infinity times, i'd still hate it. and i won't even bother to do it, like seriously. so(this is actually my favourite part of the day);

Azri helped me complete 2 of the articles!
such a dear, ain't he?

he struggled through it, undoubtedly 'cause he gets easily distracted. you should seriously see the way he gradually gets his ideas to write, lol. i can't help it but, to laugh my ass off at his priceless expressions. however, it's his efforts that counts. and, i can't thank him enough. therefore;

////edit IRP: ~~2 articles's done~~, 2 left.

as you can see, approximately 3/4 of my homework's completed. the rest, i have to do it like n.o.w? can't believe i am still typing. goodness. lol. :]

p/s: Azri, i love you. ♥

glimpse of heaven

2008-07-06T20:50:00.012+08:00

when you look me in the eyes...
i catch a glimpse of heaven, i find my paradise.

i cut my hair, again. the hairstyle's very much similar but, not the same. i prefer the current one, though(if you really must know, lol). honestly, i don't know what's the big a deal with girls should be keeping long hair etc. in fact, i find them very mundane or in other words, overly too common to the extent that they could actually bores me to death just by seeing each and every single one of them girls i came across, flipping their overflowing hairs on the top of their head. no offence though, by the way. it's not like as if girl=long hair/skirts/heels and whatever not, right? even Azri was against me having short hair initially but too bad, 'cause i'd always choose comfort over image. i don't care if i look better with long hair(as said by a lot! of people, trust me) but, i just can't stand it. rimasssss... you should seriously see Azri's expression when i told him i'm going to cut my hair, yet another time. i got to admit that my hair wasn't that long before i cut it but, i just got the urge to do so, you know. lol. thank god, since Azri knows me very well, he didn't say anything much; always respecting my decision. ^^ however so(as expected), despite the willingness, i knew that he was still half-hearted inside. hence, the reluctance; "if the hair turns out to be too short, i'm going to kill you, okay?" lol. like what the hell, he loves the outcome too anyway. what do you know, typical boys... -.-"

school's commencing this Tuesday, 8th July 2008? man, time and tide does waits for no man, aye? two days time, in such short notice(exaggerator, lol). fyi, i am still in the holiday mood. but i guess, i had a tad too much fun already. i think it is about time to buckle up, indeed. but still, i don't want to be in that state again where my life's piled up with tons of homework, forced to be obliged to school's rules and regulations, tight schedules with CCAs and such... damn exhausting! i need to live my life, not in that way, please. read; not. lol. whatever lah, azimah eh... anyways,

i had packed.
GP's project slides done.
shoes are squeaky clean/white.

i think i'm ready; "i'm ready, i'm ready, i'm ready..."(imitating Spongebob)

my umi just can't stop nagging over the littlest things, these past few days. i mean like, what the bloody hell does she want? i am so sick of her voice playing; "yadayadayadayadayada!" repeatedly in my head. just fyi, itu batu besar sentiasa ada duduk di kepala saya, should you not know me that well yet. lol. if she wants perfection, this world's definitely not the place for her. you see, i love her and all but goodness, give me a break! pleaseeeee. :/

and, i should seriously get rid of this bulky television in my room. so much for making my room any less spacious, its content furthermore equates to absolute nothingness. Suria, Kids/Vasantham Central, Channel 5/8, RTM 1... these shows sucks to the very core. i want my living room's television; that's fully equipped with Starhub Cable Vision. i need MTV for goodness sake. Disney Channel, Star World, HBO, Demand Tv etc in my room but oh my god, tsk3. look at me. astaughfirullah hal'azim... the least i could do is to be appreciative of the computer i own here in my room, considering the fact that both of my brothers are deprived of it. the source of internet connection is supposedly to be good/convenient enough for the benefit of myself. i can't believe i'm actually whining over meer issues like this. i should seriously stop thinking like a brat; like as if the whole world revolves around me. instead, i should be thankful, very thankful with whatever that i have now. that should be the way.

i'm repenting...
i'm repenting...
i'm repenting...
i'm repenting...
i'm repenting...
i'm repenting...
i'm repenting...
i'm repenting...
i'm repenting...
i'm repenting...

okay, random much? let's just strike everything off of here. :/

the boy's back in camp. :'[
i realised something;

everything's not right, 'til you're here by my side.

with love, thank you for today.
and, i miss you so much already. ♥

i'll be waiting for next weekend, this i promise you. *kiss

unwanted

2008-07-04T11:30:00.014+08:00

our state of enmity makes me want to kill myself. :'[

its like when i'm right, i know i'm right. when i'm wrong, i could've been right. so, i'm still right but, i could've been wrong, you know. to you, i'm sorry 'cause i could be wrong yesterday. nah, wait a minute; i could be wrong but, what if i'm right? see what i mean... -.-" i know it doesn't make any sense. this is the reason why i hate(may i emphasise on this strong word, thank you) to argue, especially not with Azri 'cause it makes me feel like an egoistic bitch right at the end of it; that is when i chose to hang up the phone hastily. no doubt, i'll feel guilty conscience all over but still, i didn't do anything wrong! but, why these feelings? it's irritating.

you know what, let's just forget about it.
'cause despite everything...

you know better, that these feelings'll never fade. ♥

now, about my last mid-year paper the day before; H2 Kesusasteraan... alhamdulillah, it was satisfying indeed. though nervous, i tried my very best to remain calm. i read the questions and instructions(very important!) carefully thus, poured everything that i've learnt on the writing papers; as if squeezing the juice all out of my brain, impromptu. i'd never thought that 90 minutes would be sufficient to complete the paper but, i was wrong. i learnt that if you're sitting for an exam with adequate knowledge in hand, time does not matter but, at all. tricky business, aye? to think that i'd always try to catch up with the time even if i have all of the necessary tips right at the back of my hands, end up making myself feel way more nervous to write than before resulting in the paper being handed up, incomplete. how the bloody hell could i be that stupid? one very good example would be; MOB. urgh! i knew i could've done better for that particular piece of crap, like seriously. :/

anyway, i had just beat my nephew(Akmal) up real hard for driving me nuts, literally.
there's like a huge 5-fingers red mark on his right hand triceps.

i am not proud of this.
in fact, i think my action's going to haunt me, for forever. :'[

//editted at 1858hr.

issues gives you tissues.

i can't wait for Azri's return this weekend. i need him very badly which, i don't even know why. he's my only medicine, the only one who could make me smile which i've yet to for the past two days. my mind's everywhere, my heart's jigsaw-puzzled and, i am not happy for some reason or another. i think $$$$$/account book or, both's the issue here. no wait, i think it's my-umi's-batiks-that-have-yet-to-be-retrieved-since-months-ago issue. but, then again, corset's $$$$$ issue? mid-year examination result's issue? i don't know! there's just too many issues stuck here in my head. a therapy/spa treatment would be excellent, pleaseeeee. -.-"

mood-swinging. ~!@#$%^&*()

obliterated

2008-06-30T21:11:00.006+08:00

i have a thing for fresco-effect pictures.
which by the way, i have absolutely no idea why. :/

he insist me into blogging about this small yet, impressive news regarding his current post/reputation back there in his camp; lo and behold, Azri is now the new communication i/c! or in other words, he's the only one allowed with any type of communication services(including handphone charger as well, thank goodness) wherever he go. also, he's given the right to command people as instructed by his higher authorities. oh, such privileges shouldn't be taken for granted but, at all. i knew he have a lot of potential in him and, i've always have faith in that. evidently, he is progressing very well. and i'm indeed, very proud of him. ♥

i wonder, what's more? :]

i love the way how flexible my parents are towards me nowadays. they no longer nag for hours like they would before, should i do any wrong such as; went out with Azri/friends 'til i accidentally reach home at/past midnight etc. instead, maybe a little of unwanted questions or perhaps, 'silent-treatment' which is ain't that bad afterall. you don't know how thankful i am with their positive change of attitude and, trust towards me as i grow older. i think, they finally realise that i am eventually turning into a young adult and that, they should start treating me like one already. Alhamdulillah, syukur. despite all that, i know that it is not to be taken as an advantage and that, i should still/will always be very conscious with my actions. i don't want to end up breaking their precious hearts. 'cause you see, i love them just the same and, the feeling'll never, ever change. 100% guaranteed. ♥

so, degrading parenting control equates to a burden off my shoulders, no? yay!

now, let's do a review about my past mid-year examination papers. 5 papers thus far; H2 Bahasa/H2 MOB/H2 POA/H1 General Paper/H1 Mathematics. 2 of them; failed to manage the time well enough therefore, incomplete. another 3; a tad confident, perhaps? but still... it's disappointing much. i crave for all A's supposedly but i guess this phrase,"dream on, 'cause that's life afterall" strike me hard right back to reality. i guess i've a flair in calculations so, should i do well in these two papers(H2 POA and H1 Mathematics), it wouldn't be that much of a surprise. but essays, goodness. it suffocates me just when i start staring at the questions. this thursday(H2 Kesusasteraan), would be my very last. i hope it turns out the way i wanted it to be at the end of it; satisfying. results however, have yet to be retrieved but one thing's for sure, i am so not waiting for it. :[

and, should i retake my NAPFA?
'cause i honestly, do not want to.

my heart's obliterated, i'll just do away with all of it.

better in time

2008-06-19T11:05:00.010+08:00

approximately 2 weeks had gone; time does flew by fast.
tomorrow's the day and, i can't wait! ♥

i waited for his call yesterday 'til 0200hr this morning but, to no avail. fyi, this is so unnatural to me 'cause every night, there must be at least, a call from him. i just can't stop reasoning it out but eventually, i came to understand that perhaps he's just too wearied by all the ridiculous drills he just had to be obliged to, to a point where rest and sleep are strictly demanded. or maybe, his friend's phone battery died just like his, several days ago. just so you know, they weren't even allowed to bring a charger, for handphone-charging purposes which is extremely vital(may i emphasise on this) in our lives. like hello, communication conveniences shouldn't be halted nor, thwarted but, at all. furthermore, i learnt that he was sick, two days ago hence, the unlimited worries and such. it's eating me alive. two words, people; NS SUCKS! :/

if you must know, i've been very diligent lately(lol, like wth -.-"). unbelievable but, believe it. and so, i've covered my H2 POA, H2 Bahasa/Kesusasteraan and H1 Mathematics as to what is essential for the Mid-Year Examinations. only except H2 MOB which, i've yet to start. most probably, by today and i still have like, 4 days for it... sufficient, much? i hope so. way to go, Azimah! self-motivation lah, tak ada orang nak motivate apa. lol. for now, i just hope that i will not have problems applying whatever that i've learnt smoothly on the papers or, it'll be such a painful waste i tell you. :]

plans for tomorrow;

GP's project discussion at 1000hr in school, canteen.
meet Azri from 1730hr onwards, Chua Chu Kang.

i am indeed a very busily-scheduled woman, aren't i?
no wonder i'll get stressed up easily, mainly for thinking too much. :/

if you ask me, i'll answer it honestly; it ain't easy juggling studies, serious relationship, financial, religious practices, family and, friends all at the same time. believeeeee me, for you'll never know until you're in that situation, experiencing the hurt of all the factors stated yourself. but, i'm not saying that it is entirely bad. it is just... difficult. the job of trying to impress every single soul is exhausting. that is why, sometimes, either one or two factors just had to be sacrificed. though hesitant, but, you just have to. it is all a matter of time. true, we only live once but, which factors exactly is beneficial for ~~living~~ one(or in Islamic terms, duniawi and ukhrawi)? this is where most of the people population, had gone wrong; for choosing unwisely. but, i'll always keep this in mind;

berakit-rakit ke hulu, berenang-renang ke tepian.
bersusah-susah dahulu, bersenang-senang kemudian.

if i translate those words, it'll sound very weird. lol. however so, you need not agree to this 'cause you don't have to. alright? chill. but, just think about it. it won't hurt. :]

i'm missing my Azri to the deepest core.
he'll always be one of my priorities now, that's for sure. ♥

tick-tock, tick-tock. time is ticking.
i'll better get back to mugging.

gee, it rhymes. yay?

//editted at 1623hr.

I HAVE GOT TO LOSE SOME WEIGHT!

still no news from Azri.
and, i can't help it but, to worry... endlessly. :'[

//editted at 2321hr.

finally, he called! and, it just so happens that all of my assumptions were true afterall. in anyways, 49:57 minutes talk with him then was indeed, undeniably worthwhile. he's still sick though by the way but thank god, he's in good hands. Alhamdulillah, syukur. ♥

i just want him to know that i long for him, that's all. :]

where art 'thou

2008-06-15T10:26:00.011+08:00

Friday, 20th June 2008 ---> [1730hr!]
5 more days, i'll take note of that. ♥

by the way, i didn't recall writing about this hence, i need to vent it somewhere; last Thursday, there was H1 Mathematics make-up class supposedly at 0930hr, LR1 in school. however so, none of my 08A4 mates turned up for it, except me. kind of expected it though but unfortunately for them people, attendance was taken. in short, y'all are screwed. :'[

nonetheless, the number of people who actually attended the lesson was pretty much countable with your very own fingers. yes, it was that bad so, i guess it doesn't make any much of a difference. it wouldn't be possible for them tiny group of teachers to scold one humungous cohort, no?

but still, the point is; i believe it's our responsibility as students to turn up for such useful classes specially made up for the benefits of us all or ~~you should seriously not call yourself one~~ you'll be missing out on a hell lot, literally. furthermore, i think it's unfair to the teachers. they held up classes willingly, on a holiday(may i emphasise on this) yet, only a handsome are interested. i mean why, students these days are as such? they tend to priorities wrong things, at the very wrong time. in fact, it has become a norm, dangerous one that is. current teenager society's mindset should change, forthwith.

sometimes, i'm just thankful that i'm made abnormal(not literally, thank you). believe it or not, i tend to think differently as compared to the others of my age. -.-" on a random note though, i've never felt so lonely in my life then.

tomorrow's another at 1000hr, LR1.
mug, mug and mug coming right up! :]

//editted at 1842hr.

shocking news: Irfan going off to army tomorrow?!

still in doubt though but, i'm afraid that's the truth. his deferment last month was rejected now, that's bullshit 'cause he does have valid reasons to do so, you know. whatever it is, i wish you all the best and you're definitely, going to be missed a hell lot for the next two months of your absence. we love you. p/s: thanks Raidah, for the info. ♥

yesterday, we talked.
"our life's shaping up, can't you see?" he said.

indeed. 19... it's about time we think of nothing else but, the future. in general term, of course. we'll move forward, shaping our life into how we wanted it to be not just, go with the flow or you'll regret eventually. believeeeee me.

too soon?
nah, i don't think so. :]

and oh, Usher's "Moving Mountains" is extremely marvellous.
judge it yourself.

capture

2008-06-13T15:42:00.008+08:00

i'm just a prisoner, of your love.
7 more days. ♥

i've been ~~thinking~~ worrying a lot lately. ranting it all would be a torture, moreover reading it. i'll sleep my mind off thoughts instead. :]

games, changes and fears.
when will they go from here, when will they stop?

highly opinionated

2008-06-11T15:29:00.008+08:00

pictures are significant.
the least it could do is, to make me smile. :]

he's been calling so, i guess it's not as bad as i thought it would be. i don't know why i make such a big deal out of it like as if he's so far away from me(overseas, for example) despite realising the fact that he's still in Singapore(somewhere in Chua Chu Kang, to be specific) blablabla. it's just that, i really do miss his presence a lot. you see, we'd go whenever, wherever together. and when he's not near, it's just... different. the feeling's pretty much indescribable, i must say. furthermore, my line had been disrupted(tak bayar bill punya hal -.-"). i couldn't call nor message him using my handphone as and whenever i feel like it, just like how i always did. instead, i've to wait for his every calls. fyi, my patience level is very limited. lol. yea, i think that's it. oh, bother. just 9 more days to endure, azimah. :]

p/s: i miss you... ♥

i don't think i believe in soulmates; that there must be at least someone out there made for one and, that they're destined to be together. instead, i strongly believe in falling in love, working very hard to stay true to each other, 'til our very end. couples does not mean that they're one another's perfect half. instead, couples adapt to each other's differences which sometimes, i got to admit is indeed very difficult. in our case(nurazri) for example, i do agree that fate's the one who brought us together but, we are definitely not, soulmates. why? 'cause we are so, so different from one another. however, we fell deeply in love and thus, learn how to adapt to each other gradually. we do work extremely hard, if you guys must know.

if there really are soulmates for everyone, explain unmarried people then. financial as an excuse, is definitely ridiculous. sure, two people with incomes is indeed, quite a challenge to meet today's standard of living no? -.-" and they put marriage as a burden, love as a blame to all of the problems they face, once heartbrokened, is only because they gave up way too easily! their refusal/disapprobation of love is strictly unacceptable. in anyways, i think it's all a matter of an individual's choice. should they want to have a partner for life, they'll work for it. if not, they'll just laid back and, eventually die alone. moral of the story; work for love, don't just wait 'cause soulmates ain't coming for you! lol.

wait, i've been thinking: does soulmates = jodoh? :/
i don't think so.

okay, i should seriously get back to mugging.
stress, tertekan. stress, tertekan. stress, stress. (repeat infinity times)

//editted at 2014hr.

petite but, with such voice... goodness.

one thing's for sure; she is way, way better than Rihanna whom i never really liked/admire by the way. besides having sexy long legs, i've always think that she lack the talent. thank god, 'Umbrella' is catchy. in fact, i've always believed that 'Umbrella' made her. simply to put, have you ever seen Rihanna danced like that of the video? even 'Umbrella's' music video is such a disappointment, to me at least. hands down, Kat Deluna's the next big thing. no doubt about that. enough said. :]

play hard but, study smart. :]

goodbye and, i choke

2008-06-10T08:54:00.015+08:00

∂zi's ™ : 1 Day sent 6/10/2008 6:51 AM:
i love you...
∂zi's ™ : 1 Day sent 6/10/2008 6:51 AM:
i've always do...
∂zi's ™ : 1 Day sent 6/10/2008 6:51 AM:
and will always do...
∂zi's ™ : 1 Day sent 6/10/2008 6:51 AM:
kiss

and, these tears kept rolling down my cheeks.
i tried to call at 0830hr but, i guess it's a tad too late. :'[

i miss you, already. ♥
10 days; i'll be strong.

//editted at 0948hr.

so, was out with the boy yesterday throughout, to spend as much time together as possible(sole purpose by the way, just fyi) before he leaves. we ate at Causeway Point's Pizza Hut as a start of the day where we accidentally came across Raidah(i really admire her: forever smiling, cool aje) and, her friend(very pretty though, i must say). talked a lil' bit before they left and, he did this out of a sudden, imitating the once-upon-a-time-hit-movie SCREAM's killer, if you guys'd remember, lol;

tak menjadi, i know but, wth. -.-"
simply having fun.

afterwards, we went off to Orchard. i realised it's still the same old, dull Orchard(i never really liked it, anyway) so, we met up with Agus for pool as well as, bowling instead. biasalah, 'encik sugus, enak rasa buahnya' baru dapat gaji, beb. lol. so, everything's in the house. however, i only captured some pictures during pool activities and, here they are;

Agus's positions to hit his balls are very... interesting. lol. all in all, reached home at about 2335hr, as per normal. fun, fun company to be with. :]

and oh, he called! ♥
'til later. :]]]]]

//editted at 2108hr.

Azri's enjoying his camp thus far, now that's a relief. and just fyi, he had gotten bald! lol. you wouldn't know just how much interesting this news is for me. aw, how cute. :]

on a darker side though, i think my negligence habit is slowly creeping out of me and, i hate that. the fact that i didn't actually studied anything at all today is such a bad yet, significant sign for it. furthermore, my period for the month is nothing but, a pain in my ass, literally speaking. but i've to fight, no matter what. goodness, there's only like 1 week and, 5 days left. azimah, wake up! -.-"

yea, i know what you're thinking.
mood-swinging. :'[

dilemma

2008-06-09T08:43:00.013+08:00

hereby, may i present to you the long-due pictures(not many, though) of our latest Pot-Luck gathering at Irfan's. but, beforehand;

dah besar anak mak, iye... :]

i hope you have had a great time then despite being wrestled by a handsome before you could actually blow your candles for some reason, or another, lol. may your everyday's showered with only good things in life not, otherwise. with much love, happy 19th once again. ♥

for the first and, the last picture, it's actually our attempt to try to make it look like that of F.R.I.E.N.D.S(you know, living together kind of situation etc). one word; cool. but, there's just too many of us. i'm not sure if cohabitation, not sexual-wise please, is even legal in Singapore. or, is it? :/

fyi, i'm in the midst of such a dilemma right now; between being a good, diligent daughter who stays at home for the day or, an irreplaceable girlfriend who wants to spend her very last moments with her boyfriend to make up for the next two weeks of his absence, like she should. but, Azri's going away in a day's time. there shouldn't be any doubt at all. :'[

i am so not ready for this.

take a bow

2008-06-08T09:23:00.009+08:00

i got to admit; i have this weird fetish for short, neat hairstyling.
it's rad.

Rihanna's new hairstyle is a total hotness, please! read; hairstyle not, face 'cause i don't really admire her too-strong-a-visage look for a woman. it's too... inappropriate, perhaps? you know what i mean, lol. but, to all of her fans out there, whoever and wherever they are, no offense though for i believe that the statement is highly opinionated, thank you. ♥

i love the nature of this song, 'Take A Bow' sung by none other than her. it shows that women do have the power to make desicions in terms of relationship(that is, if they wanted to) afterall. i've always believed that, women could be stronger emotionally. if not psychologically with regards to our maturity level, since it's undeniable to say that we are indeed ethically challenged in terms of physical factors, sadly speaking. if you really have to call it off, say it and put it to action. show off your i-don't-give-a-damn attitude and, leave. however so, this'll only work out provided the guy was really, convincingly in the wrong. otherwise, you're just another bitch. enough said. :]

women should not/don't deserve to be treated like toys, most definitely.
goodness, i sound so sexist. lol.

to you: i'm sorry... :'[

//editted at 2150hr.

the pressure of examinations is overwhelming.
it makes my June holidays less fun. :/

however so, i think i'm managing my time pretty well. and, there's still 2 more weeks left to go. mug, mug and mug coming right up! a side note though; GP's project discussion again tomorrow at Plaza Singapura, 1100hr supposedly. oh well, i'll see to it 'cause i've got other plans for the day as well.

god, am i a very busy woman. -.-"
tight, tight schedule, people.

pot-luck

2008-06-07T09:08:00.009+08:00

i love all of my friends here, just fyi. ♥

moments spent with them are never dull, just like that of yesterday's Pot-Luck cum Ezuan's Birthday Celebration at Irfan's. one word; splendid. the food's delicious, much thanks especially to Irfan who cooked most of it all. plus, there's too much talk/gossiping, too much gags/randomness, too much laughs and, i love it. these are the main things that we did, including games as well(not to brag but, some are actually created by ourselves, lol -.-");

Irfan, Farhan, Azri and me cooked together while waiting for other's arrival.
blasting music's involved, just fyi.
watched F.R.I.E.N.D.S season 9; that cracks us up big time.
monopoly which took ages, i tell you.
wrestle the birthday boy before the cake(baked by Raidah :]) was actually brought into the room, as a surprise.
camwhored but, pictures ain't with me. :'[
crappy fortune-telling game. lights were all switched off, only candles. thanks eh Agus, lol.
ghost story-telling in the dark. creepy...
helped Irfan, cleaned up all the mess we'd made.
hit-the-balloon-but-must-shout-people's-name-beforehand game. damn funny. those who screwed up had to entertain the others with a dare. i actually got part of my hair cut off and was forced to run with a Nemo hat on my head, outdoor back and forth. Irfan's was worst. he had to endure each and every one of us plucking at least some hairs out of his legs and was forced to drink this weird and disgusting drink we made for him out of; nescafe powder, oyster sauce, tap water etc. but, this is my personal favourite; Agus, abang bob kita, with flowers all around him... kena joget zapin beb. that's how bad it is. lol. :]
chilled and talk.

reached there at about 1400hr and, stayed on all the way 'til 2335hr that we had to take a cab ride back home. ah, satisfaction. :]

i want more, please.

and, 3 days left. oh god, can you like, not go? :'[
i'll blog again later. have a productive day everyone! ♥

love your enemies, it pisses them off.

//editted at 2136hr.

i don't think i'll blog again(proper one, that is) 'cause i came to know that there aren't any pictures of Pot-Luck but, at all. much thanks to my beloved, loving boyfriend, Azri. -.-"

p/s: seriously, you need to learn more about me. and maybe, just maybe, that this saying's indeed true; "even forever's not enough".

i am so pissed right now. :/
*bangs head on the rigid wall of mine, countless times.

29th

2008-06-05T08:15:00.002+08:00

the only place i wish to reside,
is that perfect place right at his side.

in his hands is where mine are placed,
like puzzle pieces, our fingers, they lace.

his brown eyes are where my vision rests,
as my head lays on his beating chest.

in his arms is where i love to lie,
with his breathing as my lullaby.

in that place which our souls intertwine,
and the sun will never cease to shine.

that's the place i yearn to stay,
for every moment, of every day.

happy 29th month together, baby. ♥

2 hours of blading in East Coast Park yesterday was ultimately fun, indeed. well, i guess it wouldn't be should we be an expertise in the sport which we unfortunately, definitely aren't right? lol. our multiple falls(especially Azri's) are a must-watch, i tell you! his hands are like, flying all over. once, he even grabbed on me before he fall off backwards, making me fall hard onto his front, embarrassing ourselves in the public. but, it's a-ok 'cause we laughed at it afterall. and, my butt still hurts from the fall off that pathetic slope. it's uber small, just fyi but still, couldn't even handle that. too bad, there aren't any pictures taken since we're too engrossed, trying very hard to 'master' blading. $7 for 2 hours each is so worth it, believeeeee me. :]

and the sun wasn't even scorching hot, for goodness sake or i'll be literally burnt, for sure. thank you.

right after, pool with these people; Irfan, Raidah, Ridzwan and, Yokesh was entertaining, as always. and, i learnt that i totally suck at it, sadly speaking. even Raidah and Yokesh's a pro. Azri, Irfan and Ridzwan on the other hand, tak payah nak cakap lah eh, too pro already. lol. i don't even know which sport exactly, that i am actually good at, you know. i am that bad, really. well, though my play's not at all convincing but at least, i tried. :]

then we head off to Woodlands Civics Centre's Starbucks, without Raidah though, to just sit and chill for hours, talking about our past experiences be it about secondary school life, love life etc. damn funny. but, i realised/learnt something; it's so fortunate of me to have found someone who appreciates me for me, for the way i truly am. fyi, i was never cool as an individual and i never even bother to try to be one. furthermore, i am so lost in whatever's translations be it in terms of destination, general knowledge etc. surprising but, true. sad, sad life, aye? lol. however so, he's always been there, guiding me and, i'm greatly thankful for that. this's the reason why i love him this much, no one'll know. and, we even came across this 2 pages in 'Simply Her' magazine, written mainly all about sex and its positions blablabla. kind of interesting with the usage of words such as 'the arrow of love', 'pot of gold' etc for description purposes. it cracks us up, big time! sampai kena halau, reached home at about 2335hr. ah, these feel-good moments with friends should never end, seriously.

i forgot all about camwhoring. such a waste. :[

now, i can't wait for this Friday's Pot-Luck cum Ezuan's Birthday Celebration at Irfan's! it's going to be ~~fun~~ interesting, i tell you. lol. ♥

i'll continue mugging for today. :'[

//editted at 1638hr.

tomorrow, GP project's discussion in school, at 1000hr in the morning first.
then, off to Irfan's. take note. :]

furai

2008-06-03T17:00:00.005+08:00

furai = flow.
the hottest car i've encountered thus far. ♥

too bad it ain't street legal, as yet. could you imagine driving around in that thing, making people's ears bleed from the noise? goodness. but, still... this hotstuff is irresistible much! i can't take my eyes off of it right from the very beginning, seriously. i'd wish to have one. read; wish. i know and do realise that i'm road-deprived/driving licence-less whatsoever blablabla. *rolls eyes. furthermore, it's unaffordable and, so totally out of my league. i hate that fact. :'[

H1 Mathematics revision's done. 4 more subjects left to mug upon. though it might seem impossible but, i promise, i'll manage it well. good time-management is the key to everything now, especially towards success. just hope that my ever-so-inevitable negligence habit will not overcome me during this essential period of time or, i'll regret in the end like there's no any other tomorrow. believeeeee me.

tomorrow's our 29th month, out with the boy. ♥
i can't wait!

'cause this is real, this is good.
it warms the inside, just like it should.

and most of all, it's built to last.

//editted at 2353hr.

I HATE FRIENDSTER, just fyi. it took eons to finally get a picture uploaded. damn irritating to the core. now, i've only 3 and, there's lots more to go, please. urgh! :/

ka-ching

2008-06-01T21:45:00.008+08:00

9 days left, every single passing second matters now. how i wish, i've the ability to stop time, like seriously. sighs. you know, i love you to the very extent that i'd rather die than to live without your very presence by me. i'm pretty sure, within that particular period of your absence is going to be yet another tough ride in my life, definitely. :'[

however so, i'll hold on to these words, very tightly;
"absence sharpens love, presence strengthens it."

i'll miss you, a lot. ♥

we spent our entire day, shopping. and, i only manage to get these(since i'm on the verge of bankruptcy already, -.-");

lovely, aren't they?
aaaaahhhhh, sales.

COTTON ON CARDIGAN: FROM $19.95 TO $10.00 (50% OFF!)
CHOCCOLAT TOP: FROM $23.90 TO $16.73 (30% OFF!)
FASHION.LAB TIGHTS: FROM $12.90 TO $11.50 (10% OFF!)

i realise, i'm an 'autumn'. therefore, that explains why dull and dirty colours are my new black now. lol. i suppose, only the pre-u 1 Millennians will understand all these personal grooming stuffs i'm blabbering about. :]

as for now, pardon my narcissism habits. it ain't a sin, people.

just a side note though. this is my sense of style, my way of being elegant whatsoever, and my attitude. should you not like/have any invalid or, need i say unnecessary particular reason as to why you hated it so much, just simply;

SHUT THE F*CK UP!

siapa yang makan cili, dialah yang terasa pedasnya. clear enough, yes? furthermore, i am not here to please every single soul, right? so, yeah. understand, understood. and, two words; grow up. seriously. please and, thank you. :]

the thing about love is, i never saw it coming.
it kind of crept up and, took me by surprise.

the thing about you, is you know just how to get me.
you talk about us, like there’s no end in sight.

i'm out of here. peace. ♥

jubilant

2008-05-31T16:29:00.004+08:00

expect, the unexpected.
azri's back! ♥

//editted at 2057hr.

when the sun goes down, it all turns dark.
will you be my guiding light, at the end of the road?

so, azri picked me up at 1700hr soon after he did whatever that's necessary in his home sweet home beforehand; undo all of his packed bags etc, to relieve our longing for each other.

"baby, it's only been a day..." he said. but, still...

you don't know how happy/thankful i was to see him back then, right in front of my eyes, safe in one piece. alhamdulillah, syukur. but with car keys in his hands, it simply turns me on. :]

fyi, we just got back from wherever and here i am, diligently typing. boredom kills, trust me. oh god, i miss him so much already. :'[

gentle reminder: azimah, please study. thank you. :]

that thing about love

2008-05-30T21:27:00.014+08:00

MCS's Majlis Pemasyhuran-2008 was a success, indeed. much thanks to all of our hardwork significantly given for it, especially for the pre-u 1 members(zul, niza, zahrah, sabariah, mai, aini and me);

... who plan it all out, need i emphasise this word, independently. i heard we made it the best thus far? alhamdulillah, iye. love the team-spirit, love the unity, love the people, love basically everything about us. may these feelings remain 'til whenever it's necessary. :]

so, we certainly deserve the Seoul Garden's treat then, don't you think? especially with the inclusion of our winning Khilaf in the past Sayembara Teater-2008 factor not too long ago, taken into consideration. boy, oh boy am i euphoric about that! well, you see, pictures do speak thousands of words.

I ♥ MCS!

right after, Orchard with atika and niza was fun, unexpectedly. let's do it again, shall we? lol. as for that 'bitch', can't you see that i'm simply living my life? therefore, may i suggest, you should too, like seriously. contradicting, my foot. firstly, you should know very well by now that people do talk and that your friends, are my friends way beforehand. secondly, just so you know, elegance does not mean tutup aurat, pakai tudung etc, iye. you can be sexy by being elegant or otherwise, whichever you may prefer 'cause it's all a matter of confidence, ok? anyways, cara aku pakai, tidak menyusahkan kau apa... kan? why, jjjjj-jealous? say whaaaaat! :]

i'm missing my baby too much, please(fyi, he's in Malaysia right now). :'(

p/s: i love, need you

i heard about abang lutfi's motor accident(crashed with a lorry, if you must know) and, i'm speechless. he's in a very critical condition right now. tsk, i could only wish him well. :'(

when there's a need to apologise; once, i mean it but, twice, you don't even think about it.

peace, :]

social-emotional learning

2008-05-28T09:39:00.007+08:00

08A4; friendship is a special kind of love. ♥

social-emotional learning or in short, 'SEL' camp for the last two days in school was rather unexpectedly useful, in my opinion. every single sessions included that is; team building, motivational talk, drama workshop, reflection, financial literacy, personality profiling as well as, personal grooming, was very much well-presented, engaging and worth all of the compliments. if you ask me, my personal favourite would be 'the motivational talk'. very inspiring, indeed. and not to mention, it wouldn't be that much fun, not without such great company, now would it? thanks, 08A4. i appreciate you people, so, so much. well i guess, i shouldn't have underestimated this 'SEL' camp to that very extent, aye? my bad. :]

alright, got to go for now(MCS punya hal, -.-"). have a productive day everyone!

i miss my boo...

predilection

2008-05-25T16:26:00.009+08:00

my love's charm and, i'm falling all over him again.
boy, you know i miss you. ♥

today's ayam besengek and nasi jintan putih was a success! we(umi, me and Faiz ), cracked up a lot while cooking together then in the kitchen which is such an infrequent sight, i should say. random issues are indeed very interesting and entertaining at times, no? in summary, i might love cooking afterall. well, not without such great company to do it with, though. :]

fyi, i'm loving my holidays. however, i extremely hate the fact that 10th June, is undoubtedly drawing very near. i really do not want my Azri to go. at least, not too soon(since National Service is inevitable for Singaporean men, -.-"). i mean, why has it been made compulsory? oh, how i wish i have the authority to amend such laws. you bet, i'll do it.

tv's such a bore, i feel like dumping it out of my sight. it just hurts to have such conveniency literally but, it fails to satisfy my desire, needs, wants, insertwhateverhere. sakit tahu, hati. :/

VCD/DVD's still, the bomb.

and i know my CIP(re: spreading the B.Y.O.B's awareness to primary school's students bullshit) is so long due but, heck.

a poster, made all by myself. memorable? of course and believeeeee me if i said this; it's the only thing that was. :]

at its best

2008-05-23T20:21:00.001+08:00

our laughs are limitless,
our memories are countless,
and, our friendship is endless.

don't judge me

2008-05-09T21:59:00.005+08:00

it has always been love, it has always been you, despite everything. but now, i'm the only one left to cry for i only have myself to blame. 'cause afterall, my weakness caused you pain and, i'm sorry. :'(

as for them bitches, please for god's sake, rot and die off my face. fancy bitching something bad, yet insignificant/irrelevant about me on papers? please, that kind of actions are so antiquated considering the age you are, at present and sorry but, i don't play papers. unhappy, talk it out straight to my face then, cowards. _l_

can't one possibly live in peace? goodness.

headaches

2008-05-04T09:56:00.006+08:00

i hate it when i'm stuck into doing only one essay for the whole entire day, like how i did yesterday. and i'm not exaggerating, please. much thanks to that tricky Management Of Business's question, that got me beating all around the bush about it. there's another one still, that has yet to be completed. oh god, i can't bear to endure another 16-marks essay again, like seriously. 'cause why; essays hates me, just like how i do them! urgh, irritants.

and, my horoscope for today states as follows; 'try to stop thinking so much with your heart! take an analytical perspective today.' it's not that, i believe in this unnecessary stuffs and all but still, trueness. i should really take good note of that. i bet, azri'll definitely agree to this. 'cause afterall, he does know me that much. :(

frankly speaking, i hate most of the 'up-to-date' english songs. take '4 minutes' by Madonna, Justin Timberlake and Timbaland, for example. '4 minutes' = ew, 'cause personally, i think the song's uber meaningless to the extreme although the beat's nice, undeniably. moreover, the disappointing official video doesn't help, not a single bit. madonna's old, can't sing nor dance at all. Timbaland's always the redundant one. only, Justin Timberlake was a-ok. but, they still manage to be multi-millionaires despite their limited talents. pretty much unfair, no? sighs.

in anyways, what i'm trying to say is, current malay song's the best. try searching for these; 'Seribu Kenangan' by Didicazli, 'Dambaan' by Didicazli, 'Berserah' by Taufik Batisah etc. omg, i just realised, they're all locals. best kan... support our locals, people. -grins- :)

azri, i miss you. :'(

i'll update again later, if i've the time. have a productive day, everyone. ♥

//editted at 2049hr.

what hurts the most, was being so close.
having so much to say and, watching you walk away.

never knowing, what could've been.
and not seeing that loving you, is what i was trying to do.

thanks chipsmore choc coated and, cereal drink for the company tonight. :'(

p/s: my homework's all completed like finally and, i'm craving for any type of entertainment right now. oh wait, F.R.I.E.N.D.S! :]

love's to be blamed

2008-05-03T09:08:00.005+08:00

i do miss, us you. ♥

frankly, i do not know what's becoming out of us. physically, everything might seem a-ok but, emotionally, everything's just ain't right. and it's not about the lack of love as you people may think, mind you. however so, sighs... i myself do not know what these feeling's all about either. it's been a month now, and i'm still dying inside. the question is; 'why?!' sometimes, i ponder, am i asking too much? logically, i simply can't force myself to continue, just for the sake of continuing. 'cause afterall, it's the quality that matters, not quantity. neither can i allow/bear the fact to just let us be in the pages of history without even trying. but the problem here is, i did. and, you did it too. where have we gone wrong then? please, enlighten me. for, i am in such a dilemma right now. :'(

these therapeutic tears of depression, i'll let it all out.
is this, the end?

fyi, i've not been myself for these past weeks. that explains my unpredictable temperamental-ism in school. i'm sincerely sorry to those who are affected in any way possible by it. :(

Note: Barbeque+Overnight+Farewell event on the 17th May 2008 in conjunction of the May Babies's(Azri, Raimi and Farhan) Birthday Celebration as well as Azri's taking off for National Service on the 10th June 2008, to be exact.

i'll try to be there. yet to be confirmed, though. :)

it's no good at all, to see yourself, and not recognise your face.
out on my own, it's such a scary place.
the answers are all inside of me and all i got to do, is believe.

//editted at 2300hr.

MY IMPERFECTIONS ARE ~~AFFECTING~~ KILLING ME!

is it appropriate to say that i hate my life, right at this moment in time? goodness. f*ck the hell out of me, pretty people for i abhor the very sight of you. like, seriously. :/

craves

2008-05-02T22:23:00.009+08:00

i need 2 shots of satisfying espresso pronto. fyi, i've no choice but, to burn the midnight oil throughout this entire weekend with a simple reason being, tons of pending homework that needs to be completed, ever since forever.

say no thanks, to Malay Cultural Society's tight schedule which obviously seems never ending, trust me. too proactive, perhaps? i don't know. yet, we're still unknowledgeable in Millennia Institute's higher authority's eyes. tsk3.

read; Mr Azman(MI's VP), i am so disappointed in you! -.-

dopey

2008-04-14T23:59:00.003+08:00

i am lethargic, to the very extreme.

there's too many tasks pending and to be completed in such a short period of time.

HELP! :'(

so long

2008-04-07T00:07:00.001+08:00

pardon me for this blog's yet another long abandonment.
it couldn't be help, goodness.

may i declare that i am on...

again, i know. :/

and for the record, i hate imeem.
everything's not alright.

period

2008-03-30T22:37:00.004+08:00

okay so, i'm blasting music in my ears right now, booming the entire room with it. i need it badly 'cause i'm stressing out. :'( thank god, 95% of my homework had been completed. another 5%, say no thanks to the IRP bullshit.

i'm missing Azri wholeheartedly, i could drop dead any second without his presence. and due to that, i hate my every night's sleep, word.

i am so sorry umi and baba for the unbearable noise. just please, for once, close your eyes and treat it like a lullaby.

no, it's not issues.
i think i'm having mood swings. i don't know. -.-

urgh, this is so random.

ridin'

2008-03-24T07:28:00.008+08:00

these pictures are long due undeniably but, they're memories as sweet as candy drop and still remains vividly fresh in my mind. ♥

my hero, in his rented car. -.-

charming, aye?
now, enjoy the ride.

spot any headless freak? lol.

i adore the clouds very much.
presenting, the happy goobers, with much love. ♥

thanks for the experience and i couldn't have enough.
i want more, pleaseeeee!

p/s: cars are such love, all of a sudden. :)

long gone

2008-03-21T11:13:00.005+08:00

but, i'll be back.

goodbye to you,
goodbye to everything that i knew.

1950s era

2008-03-15T08:59:00.003+08:00

dying to test my luck, i auditioned for a part. and either fortunately or otherwise, i was awarded/given the most onerous role in the Khilaf(that's what it's called) play, Hasnah. despite having very little, or not at all dialogues to memorise in a day's time before Sunday, instead i have to work on my expressionless facial expressions, hysteric body language as well as my crying techniques, a lot. easy task, you say? i don't think so. Hasnah, had a very black history if you must know. read;

A General Overview.

Ramlah; Hasnah's little sister.
Tengku Murad; an iniquitous rich men.
Kamal&Semaun; Tengku Murad's clique.
Hasnah; a known cabaret singer then, in the early 1950s.
Mami Kalsum; i/c of all her cabaret singers. Hasnah's her favourite.

her family was penniless, as poor as a church mouse(which indirectly, forced Hasnah to be a cabaret singer due to their unbearable living situation) that they're unable to re-pay all of their loan to this iniquitous dude named Tengku Murad. therefore, in condition to that, they had no choice but, to sell their precious daughter, Hasnah reluctantly to him for compensation.
unfortunately, she was treated as a sex slave instead. she was 'shared' among his friends as well, Kamal and Semaun in order to satisfy their endless greed for sexual appetite/urge that eventually caused her to lose her conscious senses as time goes by.
unable to stand the pain/grudge she's been holding on to all these while, she ran with her younger sister, Ramlah to seek help from her best friend, Mami Kalsum one day. by then, she'd already lost her mind; down with hysteria, to be specific. so, the sympathetic Mami Kalsum vowed that she'll take great care of Hasnah, as well as Ramlah, whatever it takes from then onwards.

i've got to feel her. the pain that she'd gone through whatsoever. the most important thing i should take good note of is this; she ain't crazy! she's just depressed. that's the reason why i am still figuring about the closest-to-perfect way on how to act her out in order to make her character seems... alive. -.-

wish me tons of luck, people. ♥

these thoughts

2008-03-14T06:20:00.004+08:00

my schedule's rather tight for this week. therefore, since i accidentally woke up in the wee hours of the morning, i hereby would like to take this opportunity to write about whatever that's on my mind with a single purpose; that's to enlighten somebody who in my opinion, seriously needs it. word.

please, i am a grown-up girl, who's eventually going 19 by the end of this year. read; 19! i do know how to take care of myself already. all i need from you is a wee bit of trust, a little of your constant worries that's certainly getting out of hand soon and none of your egos to worsen my everyday. whenever there's feud between us, all i ever long to hear, is a single sorry from you. forgo, for once. honestly speaking, i'm extremely exhausted by now. i could only hold on to none other than your strength, your support. or in other words, i need you, dyingly. so please, i'm begging you to understand. :'(

i'm still in, only if you're in. ♥

"if our hearts stay true together, we can overcome anything that comes in our way. anything. "

finally

2008-03-12T09:04:00.004+08:00

i am so nervous for my boyfriend, right at this moment in time.
Allah please, do have mercy. :(

//editted at 2241hr.

HE PASSED!

first trial(manual)
; with 12 demerit points, only.
Alhamdulillah, syukur ke hadrat illahi.

congratulations, my dear. ♥
you know, you deserve this fulfillment afterall.

where art thou'

2008-03-11T10:33:00.005+08:00

credit; hazlinda

i miss you people, so much. :'(

//editted at 1054hr.

so, yesterday was Malay Cultural Society's first official training for me. however so, despite being a rookie/newbie, i've already given the huge responsibility to be in charge of costumes/fashion in the 1950s for the upcoming Sayembara Teater this April, approximately. i've completed all of the necessary findings in one day, by the way. :)

and today's another. i can't wait.

sunny singapore

2008-03-09T09:07:00.007+08:00

sentosa; vivo city

it's only now do i realise that, i appreciates Singapore a lot.
thanks to Batam.

mood; thankful.

//editted at 2023hr.

the long-awaited March holidays however so, is such a drag. i couldn't be more bored/restless at home. all of the necessary textbooks have yet to be purchased, which is simply equivalent to me being too relaxed for this entire week. while all of the pre-u 2s and 3s students are struggling to prepare the necessities for their upcoming CAs when school re-opens eventually, i'll be at this computer shaking my legs, doing absolutely nothing. what a great life, aye? for now, at least. my ultimate downturn for holidays especially, is the fact of me being over(ly)protected. gee, i've got to learn how to have fun, seriously. what i meant was, i am definitely not getting any younger, right? i've got to live my life to the fullest while i can, by not violating any barriers/impediments according to my religion of course. but, how? -.-

it has been days since i last saw my dearest, physically. i'm missing him a hell much. i can't wait for this wednesday/thursday. still indecisive about it, though. oh well. :/

Monday: MCS Training, 1300-1600hr.
Tuesday: MCS Training, 0900-1300hr.

at least, there are activities i can look forward too. lol. :)

'til other times, goodbye.

SOS, please

2008-03-06T19:51:00.005+08:00

today's atrociously the worst, ever. period.

so, i raised my voice at a particular 'teacher' in Millennia Institute, who certainly do not deserve my respect but, at all(word), my boyfriend's currently in his lowest self-esteem state which in turn, affects my disposition very much as well(but, he's not to be blamed, though) and the staircase incident, goodness. -.-

fyi,

incident; an embarrassing occurence.

you judge. :'(

on a brighter note though, it's Malay Cultural Society(posted CCA) tomorrow. it's not Malay Dance please, 'cause i am so nauseously sick of it. p/s: i've been a dancer since like, forever.

i can't wait. ♥

26th♥

2008-03-04T18:46:00.002+08:00

this indescribable feeling's just for you.
p/s: i love you. ♥

electrified

2008-03-03T21:04:00.004+08:00

a marvellous piece. :)

i love today.
and, tomorrow's our 26th. ♥

it couldn't get any better than this, seriously.

`te amo

2008-03-02T09:59:00.009+08:00

let's enlighten the new month with a themed skin, full of love. ♥
"i'm going to saint your mother, just for giving you birth."

//editted at 1838hr.

i am extremely intimidated to learn that Mas Selamat Kastari(a fugitive Jemaah Islamiyah leader, should you not know) is still free, lurking around clueless somewhere out there.

scrutinise his looks, people;

note: he is a very dangerous criminal/threat!
so please, one and all Singaporeans, do cooperate with the thorough search for him.

violent people should die, seriously `cause i believe that they do not deserve the right to live. Islam certainly do not teach its followers/believers to play havoc with basically anything, in any way. instead, we strive for peace and maintain it while we can. therefore, all these chaos in order to establish a so-called, 'Islamic Nation', in South East Asia should stop this very instant before more innocent people are trapped in the verge of getting killed. sympathise, please. now learn that, 'leader'.

i've yet to complete everything that's needed for Tuesday's presentation regarding the career of my group's choice, ship captain. we're doing pirates instead since their job scope is rather similar, i should say.

here's how Hafiz(the presenter) should possibly look like for the day;

it should be fun, LOL.
i can't wait. :)

i've got to complete it by today `cause tomorrow, i'll be out for some fun with Azri. don't get it wrong though. i have no school tomorrow due to Millennia Institute's Official Staff Development Day thingy. so, don't be alarmed. i am certainly not going back to black again, never. :)

spread the love

2008-03-01T18:55:00.010+08:00

goodness, it's already the 1st Of March hasn't it?
how time flies. -.-

thank god, my 2nd MI orientation's over. however so, the memory'll still linger. Barney(my orientation group/clan) was awarded 'Best Cheer' amongst the rest. judging from the huge number of people losing their voices by the end of the overall events proves our zest of enthusiasm very much. we certainly deserve the recognition, indeed. ♥

here's our lengthy of cheers, if you guys'd care;
(Danial's an awesome cheerleader, by the way)

Danial:
BARNEY, SEDIA!
(and everybody stomps their right leg, shaking the entire hall)

SHOW ME SOME LOVE...
(one and all throws their heart-shaped hands in the air with unbearable shouting)
Danial and Clan(repetition):
GIVE ME A B! (B!) -sway to the right-
GIVE ME AN A! (A!) -sway to the left-
GIVE ME A R! (R!) -sway to the right-
GIVE ME A N! (N!) -sway to the left-
GIVE ME AN E! (E!) -sway to the right-
GIVE ME A Y! (Y!) -sway to the left-

WHAT DO WE GET?! (BARNEY!) -jumps-

Danial:
THIS IS THE REMIX, THE REMIX, THE REMIX GUYS!
HERE WE GO, HERE WE GO!
HERE WE, HERE WE, HERE WE, HERE WE GO!
Clan:
SIMPSONS, GET BARNEY!
NEUTRONS, GET BARNEY!
FLINTSTONES, GET BARNEY!
EVERYBODY, GET BARNEY! x3
(repeat this whole cheer twice)
Danial and Clan(repetition):
LET'S GO!

EARLY MORNING, LATE AT NIGHT! (clan repeats)
BARNEY CHARGES OUT TO FIGHT! (clan repeats)
BLABLABLABLABLABLABLA -i forgot this part-
BARNEY WILL WIN THE WAR! (clan repeats)

WE WILL WIN THE WAR! x3 (ONE MORE TIME!)
-claps with stomping of feet-

WE WILL WIN THE WAR! x3 (ONE LAST TIME!)
-claps with stomping of feet-

WE WILL WIN THE WAR! x3 (Ooooooooooo...)
-claps with stomping of feet-

BARNEY!
Danial:
NOW, ARE YOU READY TO DANCE PEOPLE?!
SWIPE YOUR SHOES!
(and everybody swipes their shoes off)

Danial and Clan(with actions):
YOU CAN SHINE LIKE ME!
YOU CAN ACT LIKE ME!
YOU CAN DANCE LIKE ME!
YOU CAN WIN LIKE ME!

WE'RE BARNEY! (SAY WHAT?!)
WE'RE BARNEY! (AGAIN!)
WE'RE BARNEY! (ONE LAST TIME!)
(repeat this whole cheer twice)

To end:
(clap your left, then right knee. clap your left, then right chest. and point forward with both fingers while shouting, BARNEY! to the opponent.)

-ROARSSSSS!-

thus, it ends with unbearable roars, louder than ever.
picture the entire thing, yourself. :)

presenting part of my mates from Barney;

great company. ♥

p/s: i look extremely fat in pictures, don't i? :'(

my relationship with Azri however, is never better. we're taking it slowly and i love it this way. thank you, for everything; patience, comfort, advises etc. you're always there. i love you. ♥

"i'll be your sunshine, if you'll be my silhouette."

nothing more like it

2008-02-25T19:10:00.004+08:00

it hurts so good. :'(

ATTENTION; HIATUS!

ballads

2008-02-21T05:09:00.003+08:00

"gapai semua jemariku, rangkul aku dalam bahagiamu
ku ingin bersama berdua, selamanya.

jika ku buka mata ini, ku ingin selalu ada dirimu
dalam kelemahan hati ini bersamamu, aku tegar."

feeling sentimental, only just a little. :)
p/s: i love you. ♥

one love

2008-02-18T17:12:00.002+08:00

if life is only for awhile, then why is it this difficult?
i need answers, in all conscience. :'(

the belated

2008-02-17T16:38:00.003+08:00

my Valentine cum umi's birthday was memorable indeed. :)
how's yours?

my 6-day absence from the blogoshere is nothing new, i supposed. oh well, i've been very busy with school and such that i hardly have the time to share. please understand, thank you.

still, how do you like my new blog's skin? this is absolutely random but, i just love the idea of the guy being blindfolded which, i do not know why. kinky, perhaps? LOL, pardon me.

tomorrow'll probably be a free period throughout in school since it's the last day of PAE, so i've heard. or maybe, we'll be watching random movies in a very short time which i really dislike, mainly due to dissatisfaction/my i-want-more attitude. i hate being halfway-through a particular agenda, that's all. so, should i or shouldn't i be present in school unnecessarily? i'm still at doubt, though.

she looked a lot like Dora, The Explorer in this picture, agreed?
i'm missing this baby girl very much already. ♥

and Azri's going dinner later on. you bet, i'll miss him too.
have fun, dear. ♥

'til other times, goodbye.

//editted at 1827hr.

goodness.

i realised, i haven't any photos of Azri in my Friendster account.
i've got to get one.

new one that is, pleaseeeee.

amateur debater

2008-02-11T20:43:00.001+08:00

no doubt, today's debate in class was inspiring.

note;

ALWAYS, BE CRITICAL!
OPINIONS BROUGHT FORWARD, MUST BE LOGICAL!
PRESENT YOUR FACTS AND EXAMPLES, VIVIDLY!
ENSURE NO ASSUMPTIONS, AT ALL COSTS!

extremely crucial ground rules of a discussion not to be taken lightly. goodness, i am such an amateur debater. -.-

friendster's going down

2008-02-10T07:22:00.000+08:00

FRIENDSTER SHOULD REALLY SHUT ITS DUMB WEBSITE DOWN! :/

to think that i had to refresh the page countless times just to edit a tiny bit of my profile, is very irritating indeed. this is the reason why i couldn't be bothered with it. well not anymore, at least. 'cause not only is it disappointing, it triggers the impatient side of me very much that i could possibly kicks someone's ass right after, as and whenever i put it to use. it is that bad, seriously.

deep down inside of me, i'm dying to see the boy.
like, desperately.

but, i don't know if i could. :'(

men&boys differ

2008-02-09T18:22:00.003+08:00

this song, Lelaki by Siti Nurhaliza(that is currently being featured on my blog), is specially dedicated to 2 awesome men that has endlessly made such an extraordinary impact in my life; my father, baba as well as my one true love, Azri. read;

telah berdiri seorang lelaki
hidup berbekal kecekalan diri
walau menghadapi sejuta cabaran
terus berpaut pada kebenaran

berkurun sudah kau merintis jalan
bertahun sudah hasratmu terhalang
tetap bersemarak api keazaman
bara keramat doa dan harapan

kau melangkah bermula dari lembah
kau mendaki setangga ke setangga
semakin hampir menjejaki puncak
semakin sering kau ditikam onak

namun kerana kau lelaki
derita dapat diselindungi
tangisanmu
rahsia di hati

kesepianlah teman nan sejati
di dalamnya kau mengenal diri
tenangnya wajah matangnya bicara
kerana kau meyakini Tuhanlah yang maha esa

indulge in those words, and you'll know it's deep.
i love, and respect both of you, just the same. ♥

therefore, to the ladies, i assure you to treasure/appreciate your men 'cause you know they're worth it. that is, if they were. :)

//editted at 2054hr.

to my favourite boys;

♥ bibi will always love you. ♥

supposedly,

Muhammad Akmal Muhammad Rafiee(black shirt): 21/01
Muhammad Iqbal Muhammad Rafiee(grey shirt): 09/02

but, my sister chose to combine both parties together which falls on 08/02(fyi, it's yesterday -.-) instead, that is somewhere in between both of the above stated dates, taking the public holidays to an advantage. wise choice, aye? :)

presenting, the long-awaited cake;

-.- as long as they're happy with it, lol. i learnt that they chose the design on the cake themselves by the way. and not only that, they received quite a load of presents too. kids these days are so lucky, i tell you.

happy babies. ♥

my eyesight's worsening pretty badly. -irritated-

just so you know, i really don't like the idea of having to work past midnight. personal issues, i guess. oh well.

i miss you. and, goodnight. :)

crybaby

2008-02-07T07:30:00.000+08:00

KATHERINE HEIGL IS ~~THE~~MY NEXT JULIA ROBERTS FOR SURE!

though innocent-looking but, acts excellently. just like Julia. and i hate to admit this but, she made me cry in one of its scene. i could really feel her character, that's all. just so you know, there's only two English movies thus far, that had successfully broke me down; 'A Walk To Remember' as well as '27 Dresses'. Hindustani movies(especially the ones with Shah Rukh Khan starring in it) however... countless times! goodness, congratulations aye. :)

"i've found the best in you."

//editted at 0750hr.

fyi, i'm not really an avid Friendster user.
therefore, may i officially declare that my account's dead.

but, it's still there though, virtually.

i surrender

2008-02-06T15:30:00.000+08:00

Taufik Batisah's Berserah rendition is commendable.

tuhanku (my ~~lord~~Allah)
ku relakan segala (i will accept everything, willingly)
takkan pernah, ku akui kalah (never, will i admit defeat)
ku percaya, ku yakin padaNya (i believe, i have faith in Him)
Dia yang menentukan semua (He is the one who decides everything)
ku berserah (i surrender)

a marvellous piece. :)

//editted at 2020hr.

GP's homework is such a headache. thank goodness i manage to complete it in barely 2 hours. i realised, my vocabulary sucks to the core that i have to flip through the pages of my pocket dictionary umpteen times just to answer those typical comprehension questions. oh, pity me. -.-

POA however, is the best. as yet. :)

CNY's concert in school was delightful. for the very first time in my life, i appreciated the lion dance performance more as compared to the rest, which is rather dull/common i should say. why not? only now do i know that lions could be tacky but, absolutely naughty at the same time. they sure know how to entertain the audience very well. congratulations! even i was amazed. :)

sadly, i could snap not even a picture. very typical reason being; handphones are not allowed in the school hall. -.-

it's such a long weekend to look forward to. i've had plans but i have no idea whether i'm able to be up for it. being overprotected is ain't pretty, people. but, i'll try to, despite knowing it being undeniably risky to a very large extent. p/s: i hate to disappoint any individual in particular. :(

i hate cili padi, please.
it spoils my umi's nasi goreng's decent taste. :(

i'm missing my Azri very much right now.
nights, lovelies. ♥

what will it be?

2008-02-05T06:35:00.000+08:00

i realised, i have a new wish; longer hair. -.-

//editted at 1940hr.

so, i tried to make my blog look at least something like this;

unfortunately, i hate the outcome. though flowery-looking physically, it'll not brighten my everyday like it should due to its very dull a colour/an appearance. basically anything that relates to positivity is ultimately crucial in my life which is undeniably strange(i know) but, true. therefore, i decided to stick to my current one a little while longer since it looks kind of cheery, don't you think? :)

Azri's busily working and i couldn't be more bored, seriously. and oh, i've yet to do my crunches, sit-ups etc for the day. inevitable habits, what can i say. however, it does help me a lot. despite having PE lessons in Millennia Institute being a torture to many, since we're treated like some kind of military inmates or something but, it strangely ain't for me. perhaps, i'm already used to it. see, exercising regularly is so worth it, trust me.

haven't i told you that my H2 Maths lesson for today is the bomb? we did absolutely nothing but, games and i was supercalifragilisticexpialidocious(go figure). our group won, by the way. kwang, kwanggg, kwanggggg.

goodness, my stomach's grumbling but, there's nothing to eat. :(

tomorrow's half-day so, should i or shouldn't i go to school?
and, should i, or shouldn't i watch F.R.I.E.N.D.S tonight?

oh, the randomness.

early bird

2008-02-04T07:12:00.000+08:00

i am such an early bird.
like, who actually blogs at this hour? -.-

make-ups are so history now. not entirely, though. :)

my school'll only commence at 0910hr, my niece and nephews has yet to arrive, my heart's yearning endlessly for his presence by me and i'm dead bored. thank god there's RIA 89.7FM to entertain my every morning, seriously.

i'll blog again later, if i've the time. have a productive day, everyone! ♥

//editted at 1812hr.

finally, here's;

'THE GAME'

COMPLETED!

although there's some minor changes had to be made(report-wise) still, it's all set and ready for tomorrow's presentation. thanks everyone for the contributions made as a team, despite knowing very well that the teacher would definitely not even care less about our efforts. :)

i can't wait to see Mdm Izliyana's eyes filled with awed. -.- exaggerator.

on a brighter note however,

between the good and the bad, it all don't matter 'cause it has always been great with you. you've showered me with that great a love that even sins could taste so sweet. you should know by now that you're my paradise on earth and i'll stay true for as long as it takes. Muhd Khairul Azri Abdul Ghafar, i love you. and forever will. ♥

new pictures of us soon, pleaseeeee.

goodness, it's dusk already. oh well.

$$$, abs

2008-02-03T08:35:00.000+08:00

despite the 'horrific' yet expectable news about the indecent increase of Cathay's movie tickets recently, still, movies are a must. i believe that the theatre's booming sound effects are incomparable considering the fact that i haven't own stereos of any sort in my house which simply explains why DVD's still stands as its subordinate. perhaps, not for long. -.-

i've caught these two movies with my dear not too long ago and indeed, it left such a great impact on me right after. Johnny Depp is undeniably awesome as Sweeney Todd(The Demon Barber Of Fleet Street) which mainly emphasises on this term, D.T.A(Don't Trust Anybody) very much while The Mist's specialty however, is more to the message they're trying to convey that is, "Fear Changes Everything." although the gigantic monster's role in it is pretty much surreal but still, it helps to portray the hidden message behind it all very effectively that i am impressed, as well as sympathetic towards the main actor(whose name i do not know of) in the movie. if only he could wait another minute... sighs. overall, both are definitely worth the watch, and money. :)

Britney Spears's still the best. is, not was. and i've always admired her toned body, which i do not know why, LOL. so, i watched her interview(when she was still sane, though) with Ellen Degeneres and it inspired me, sit-ups wise. from 04:30mins onwards if you guys'd care.

ABS! come to mama. -.-

i'm going to kill my boredom with Anak Halal at YouTube now. see, i don't rely on DVD's at all. either movies or free movies at YouTube etc. that's my choice. :)

//editted at 2108hr.

this is what i've been doing the entire day(fine, i'm exaggerating a little. -.-);

my 3rd MOB project in barely a month, 'The Game'. tsk.

we're supposed to create a business game. so, we decided to combine Snake&Ladder with Monopoly for our very own masterpiece. weird but, oh wells. report with rules and instructions, check! drafts/sketch, check! cards, check! figures, check! only the game/prototype itself has yet to be completed. hopefully, by tomorrow. :)

so, i'm all set for school.

and umi's Nasi Ayam Penyet is the cream of the crops.

I AM SUCH A HAPPY GOOBER TODAY!

i can't wait for time to fly 'cause i'm dying to see my sayang tomorrow. but, this inconsiderate, singing Malay group at the nearby court is totally pissing me off all of a sudden. it's at night, for god's sake. and it definitely ain't a lullaby. urgh!

i'll try very hard to sleep tonight. may i succeed. -.-

a new beginning

2008-02-02T08:56:00.000+08:00

now, i would love to start anew.
"don't judge me tomorrow, by the way i'm acting today."

//editted at 1820hr.

to the Chinese(whom i know/am close with, mainly);

it's a fake orange, by the way.

i can't wait for the festive day to come either, probably due to the public holidays i've been yearning for since forever. well, it's actually 'the plans' for both days that got me all excited to be specific, not the celebrations whatsoever. i honestly do not need any further resting 'cause i think i've had sufficient enough. why not? i've been sleeping from 2100hr-0500hr approximately, which makes a good 8hr sleep daily since 2nd January. not only that, my 'computer's-a-must' habit has been potentially cut down, but shan't be depleted. i'll try to go online/blog whenever i've the time. also, i've been eating lots of fruits(mainly oranges) and drinking lots of mineral water for nutrients/vitamin C's purposes. simply to say, i lead a pretty much, healthy lifestyle nowadays. -.-

school has been great. all projects have an excellent end to it, homeworks are manageable and i'm ultimately thankful. i do have some pictures to share. take a look;

THE BUKIT BATOK BUSINESS COMMUNITY PROJECT

THE GEL-O-COMB PROJECT

both projects are chosen to be displayed at the Millennia Institute's Grand Open House recently, so i've heard. :) well, it's worth the efforts, seriously. p/s: to Hazlinda, as well as Syarinah, i'm going to miss you guys so, so much, you'll never know. still, do keep in touch, alright? much loves and thanks for the contributions made. ♥

i know some of you are curious as to why i am a Millennian out of a sudden. it's simple. the reason being is this, polytechnician's criteria for university admission is totally out of my league and that is a total GPA of 3.5(approximately) and above. therefore, i withdrew and decided to try A-levels instead. you wouldn't want to know the discouragements i received from anyone possible upon staying true to my final decision. i was bombarded with words concerning stupidity, foolishness etc. for backing down after being halfway through the Diploma course that i took then.
but bottom-line is this, i know what i want to achieve(SMU/NUS/NTU) for now and that's that.

he's been there through it all.
our love's here to stay.
♥

THANK YOU.

Azri's. says:
kasihan you seorang
»» ∂zi's ™ «« says:
no lah
»» ∂zi's ™ «« says:
i ada you
»» ∂zi's ™ «« says:
mana ada seorang sayang
»» ∂zi's ™ «« says:
tak pernah ok
Azri's. says:
aww...
Azri's. says:
sweet nya

"you're on my heart, just like a tattoo."

back to school

2008-01-12T15:20:00.000+08:00

so, my first week of school was pretty much an a-ok i guess. well, thank goodness for that. and since i am officially a Millennian, i had to buy, thus wear the uniform every single day already(not my favourite part of the week, definitely -.-) while it's not compulsory for others since they're only temporary students as yet. however, due to that, it bugs me pretty badly 'cause almost all teachers, as well as students thought i was one of them who retain their pre-u 1. undeniably, i was bombarded with an infinity of questions as to why i already own an MI uniform, whether i am indeed a retainee and such. urgh, as if looking too old for the class isn't bad/worst enough.

radio is a must now. it keeps me company all the way to, and from school. and since i am not really an avid radio listener before, it's strange how i find it rather fascinating now i should say. only then that i started questioning myself, how the hell does a radio(especially the ones in your handphone, if you have any) works? is it through radio waves and stuffs or, GPRS whatsoever blablabla... unnecessary? well yeah, i thought so too but, it just amazes me how advance technology is presently. and that, it's ultimately sad i couldn't think that far. i'll probably be a millionaire, that is, if only i could. wouldn't that be oh, so awesome? sighs, fat hopes.

GP, MT, Maths is nothing new. but, on the other hand, POA and MOB are. i realised, i suck at both, seriously. i said i needed help but, thank goodness, i was encouraged. durh, it takes time to expertise a certain subject, agreed? see how kanchiong/kiasu i am. i'm so afraid of failing yet another time that it's starting to drive me crrrrrazy all over! -insertwhateverexpressionshere-

so yeah, `til other times for a proper(i promise!) update.

we're built to last

2008-01-06T09:06:00.000+08:00

i've looked for love in stranger places, but never found someone like you.
someone whose smile makes me feel i've been holding back, and now there's nothing i can't do.

'cause this is real, and this is good.
it warms the inside just like it should, but most of all, most of all, it's built to last.

all of our friends saw from the start, so why didn't we believe it too?
now look where we are, you're in my heart now and there's no escaping it for you.

'cause this is real, and this is good.
it warms the inside just like it should, but most of all, most of all, it's built to last.

walking on the hills that night, with those fireworks and candlelight.
you and i were made to get love right.

'cause this is real, and this is good.
it warms the inside just like it should, but most of all, most of all, it's built to last.

'cause you are the sun in my universe, considered the best when we've felt the worst.
and most of all, most of all, most of all, most of all, most of all, most of all, it's built to last.

don't let me be the last to know

2008-01-06T01:06:00.000+08:00

just a short update. =)

so we'd broke off(officially) but, still in good terms though.
no elaborations needed, thank you.

note: i won't be updating this blog of mine that frequently since i'm permanently a Millennian now(and proud to be one too by the way, yippieeeee!) thus, that explains my tight schedules and stuffs, from the following Monday onwards. you wouldn't want/expect me to juggle school, work and unnecessary computer-related thingy altogether, would you? it's so wrong plus i totally suck at multi-tasking, seriously. it'll eventually lead to my very own downfall. i've been through that part of my life and believe me if i say this, it ain't fun, at all. you simply wouldn't want to know. let alone, experience it for yourself. it hurts, twice as hell.

maybe, just maybe, i'll be posting at least a little something, only on weekends. that is, if i have the time. otherwise, you just have to wait a tad longer for future updates i guess? tee hee hee.

so yeah, that's it. i'm yawning back to sleep. nights, everyone.

p/s: Millennia Institute's orientation was such a blast! i love it. ♥

millennia institute

2007-12-30T13:12:00.000+08:00

Millennia Institute have yet to call and confirm about it.
i mean pleaseeeee, it's eating me alive. ='(

however so, my resignation letter had been submitted. no doubt, there's so many reactions i had to endure half-heartedly back then but, they should understand and respect the main objective/purpose behind it all: education.

oh, the priority.

i'll just sleep my mind off thoughts

2007-12-26T22:02:00.000+08:00

i am so dead beat.

i realised, i've been too caught up with work(which simply explains the utter silence in this blog for approximately 6 days already -.-). it's only now that i could have at least some rest, considering the fact that tomorrow's my only off day for the week. pfft. fyi this very month, as in December itself, two double-pay(s) are already in hand due to Hari Raya Haji, as well as Christmas consecutively, mind you. it's not that i'm proud of it instead, i am extremely exhausted, and ultimately sick of all the 'forced' chores to the very maximum. i haven't any sufficient rest lately, i'm just bored of having to entertain rude customers who couldn't even care less about me, i'm tired of doing what people told me to do and i'm sick of hearing, "excuse me Miss, blablabla." which indirectly, causes me to be more... temperamental? i don't know. all i know is, i can't wait to get out of all of those. two more days. i'll hold on for just, two more days, people. =(

about my relationship however, please, do not ask anything about it 'cause it'll only give me headaches, deathly headaches to be specific. even if i try to explain it bit by bit, none would ever understand. but still, i love you, Azri. this, you should know. ♥

it's been raining movies, as usual. god, we've started spending our money on such unnecessary stuffs again, haven't we? oh wells, i am legend was worth-the-watch although it's pick-up was rather slow, i should say. typical zombies, virus/biohazards nonsense kind of storyline but still, Will Smith succeed in keeping me awake throughout the entire movie. i've always loved his acting, and forever will! national treasure, book of secrets on the other hand, was awesome. although the make-believe 'treasure' at the end of it, and their breathtaking efforts to get to it was pretty much unbelievable i must say, it's indeed very entertaining and definitely a must-watch to all people of all ages! okay fine, i'm exaggerating a little. -.- just watch it and you'll know.

this is weird but, i'm on a diet, like seriously. no playing now 'cause i've got to get back to my ~~usual~~ healthy(to me, at least) weight in a limited period of time. i just have to. i don't want to look fat and more importantly, i don't want to feel fat, you see. i'll lose my confidence that easily, trust me. and oh, not forgetting, i've done thousands of crunches and sit-ups but, where's my goddamn abs man?! urgh! see, i'm moody already. temperamental, remember?

nights, lovelies.

some things that don't really matter

2007-12-20T21:55:00.001+08:00

strangely cute. ♥

they(mainly Cavana's kitchen crew) accidentally came across this rare heart-shaped potato in one of the many sacks they bought for the week, 2 days ago. i find it very interesting that i just had to take a picture of it. cool, aye? and speaking of hearts/loves etc., i got to know that on the day of our break-up, that is on the 17th, Yong Zhang and Stella(my close Cavana-ians) on the other hand, finally got together after months of admiring each other, though at all denial about it. oh, come on you guys! wow, one relationship's taken down while another was born on that very same day. funny but, it amazes me, really. anyways, stay strong and do keep the relationship as healthy as always. it's vital, trust me. however, my manager and supervisor, both Sammy and Annie respectively, isn't that happy with the expected news. they're sort of angry with them 'cause they play too much ever since, so i've heard. not that it really matters to me but, they acted pretty much the same towards me and Azri back then so, it's not something new afterall. typical manager-staffs issues i supposed. sighs. i shall try not to think too much about it.

and hey, not to brag here but an anonymous complimented on my 'excellent' services towards him/her to the higher authorities of Cavana via e-mail and they're undeniably very impressed. it's funny, really. i was just trying to do the right thing. and perhaps the littlest thing that i did then gave such a great impact on him/her. nevertheless, i thank you so much, Mr/Ms Unknown. you make me feel appreciated, without even knowing about it. ♥ not to forget, someone's already hinting on me. like goodness, i'm not even over my break-up yet. it's superbly irritating. whenever you passed by Cavana, you'd smile and throw those cheap lines on me that'll never work. -laughing out loud- though older and good-looking, he's one of Sun Plaza's cleaner. yes, it's true. oh boy, try your VERY best to capture my heart, okay? peace.

i can't believe my parents would actually care to help me revamp my bedroom today, and it's even without my presence. it's supposed to be a surprise, you see. sweet, aren't they? awwwww, i am so touched! i know i should take a picture of it but i am simply too lazy for that. oh, i am so in love with my bedroom right now. thanks umi and baba! i love you.

Asian Idol's indeed very unexpected but i love the winner, 'cause it might sound so lame but, he really reminds me of someone that i really, truly care about. oh, bother. p/s: Guy Sebastian's voice makes me melt. it's sexy, well to me at least. -grin-

goodnight, loves.

aidiladha 2007

2007-12-19T23:35:00.000+08:00

to all Muslims around the world(especially those doing their haj, a pilgrimage to Mecca),

SELAMAT HARI RAYA AIDILADHA!

Labbaikallah huma labbaik!
Labbai kala~ sharikalakalabbaik!
Innal hamda, wanni'mata!
Lakawalmut, la~ sharikalah!

Alhamdulillah, syukur.

i'm going to be there someday, 'cause i've always wanted to be there doing whatever that we're supposed to(and that is our ultimate acts of worship towards Allah, specifically), insya'allah. sama-sama do'akan lah eh agar hajat saya ini tercapai? -giggles-

♥♥♥

so, my weakness caused you pain. what about yours? ='(
it caused me... part of my life. half of it.

='(

2007-12-18T22:26:00.000+08:00

some people come into our lives and quickly go.

some people move our souls to dance, they awaken us to new understandings with the passing whisper of their wisdom.

some people make the sky more beautiful to gaze upon, they stay in our lives for awhile, leave footprints on our hearts.

and we are never ever the same.

[//read]
living my life as a single girl again was pretty much abnormal i should say. no more constant SMS's, no more late night calls, no more that ever so beautiful three-letter-words to be heard, no more having funs etc. but hey, i'll get used to it. there's always a start to a new beginning, am i right? one thing's for sure, i ain't going back that track... with the same person. i think i've had enough. furthermore, for the very first time, i had the sincerest support/motivation from my parents that i longed for since ever, seriously. they're my strengths for now and it is indeed enough to help me glide through these hardships with ease. none could ever beat that. ♥

it's just funny when you think that you're really, truly, madly, deeply in love with someone but, you just simply couldn't see your future(that you've dreamed of) deep in his eyes. it's funny when i thought that he was really the one when suddenly, out of the blue, i realised that he wasn't afterall. and it's funny when i thought that it's his warmth that'll give me comfort 'til my very end, seems rather cold right now. some things just can't happen, even if we keep saying that it will. it's indeed painful but, i'll just let it be. ='( i've loved you, heart and soul so strong that i simply couldn't endure it any longer. i'm not saying it's entirely your fault. it could've been mine too 'cause we both did our part so, i'm sincerely sorry for whatever really. so baby, before that love changes to hate, i think it's best we stop before we go anymore deeper then where we've been now(which is already, undeniably deep enough). i hope you'd understand.

remember, love without respect is meaningless. just so you know, that's where our relationship's at. and when you said that i'll regret over this, sorry but, i didn't and never will. is it... wrong? sighs.

due to this issue however, i thought of deleting my Friendster account, change my e-mail address, re-boot my home PC which is full of our pictures, open a new blog etc. but, i just can't. maybe, just maybe, that it's not for now. perhaps i am not really 'over' it yet, you see. i guess i'll have to wait for ??? days/months/years longer. i don't know. but, i did some minor changes here and there if you guys'd care. -.- oh, bother.

just a side note though,

ABANG: $150.
AZRI: $300.

if you had promised me that you'll pay up, then you might jolly well please do so 'cause yes Azri, honestly i'm broke. i did my part when you're in desperate need for money so, why can't you guys do the exact same thing, am i right? screw empty promises, seriously!

i guess that's all for today. i need a good night's sleep. ♥

odyssey

2007-12-17T13:00:00.000+08:00

Reflections 2007
Odyssey

venue: Republic Polytechnic, the republic cultural centre-theatre(level 1)
date/time: 15 December 2007 on a Saturday, 1930hr

let's start with just a little preview of the overall performance.

thoughtful yet, very entertaining at the same time.

the hidden message that they are trying to convey here was pretty much very simple i should say. it's about how humans nowadays are taking almost everything in this world for granted, that they aren't thankful enough and that there's just too many wrongdoings that we did yet we never really cared about it. they're trying to make us realise that the disastrous Tsunami(and many other natural disaster as well) that happened not many years ago wasn't just another catastrophe, or just another saying that our mother nature's angry again blablabla... instead, it's also Allah's way to show that he needs more from us, to wake us up from our negligence towards Him all this while. He thinks that it is about time for all of us to repent while we still can 'cause He knows, above all others that the end of the world is indeed drawing so, so near. if we, as Muslims still don't get it after watching this moving show/performance, i seriously do not know what to say.

to me, it wasn't just an entertainment, from the way it was choreographed and whatnots. it wasn't even about just another sad documentary that we should watch. instead, it got me thinking. it moved me that i felt so bad about myself, reminiscing each and every sins that i had done all these while, over 18 years of my life. i nearly cried when she said this,

BARAHKAH PENYAKITNYA BUMI?!
atau bumi yang sudah kehilangan segala barakah untuk diberikan kepada kita?

or something like that. what it means is simply this. despite having to endure the Tsunami, endless earthquakes, volcano eruptions etc. in this world that we live in, we as humans, naturally, tend to be angry with the earth itself questioning, "why must earth be so weak? why must god punish us this way? why must god created us to live in the first place when in the end, He was the one who destroys us?" but the truth/fact is people, we fail to realise that all these while, earth was supposedly created to fill humans that live in it with pleasures like for instance, the mother nature itself. it is our doings that destroys it, bit by bit that left earth with nothing more to give. oxygen's deceasing, harmful air's increasing surrounding us. so, who's to blame anyway am i right?

sighs. all i'm saying is, if you have the heart and brains, just think about it. anyways, Asri, Jannah and Kak Zub(since they're the only ones i know participating), excellent, fabulous, fantastic job! i love it.

picture's next.

p/s: tak ada digital camera, Cyber-shot K810I pun jadilah, for the time being. ='(

there's a lot! more people than this, trust me. it's almost like a reunion or something. everyone was there and i miss allllllllll of them so much! it's been eons since we last met, really. that explains why i'm pretty much over-the-top that day(especially Azri. he's so crazy then!). -laughing out loud- nonetheless, i had such a great time. thank you so much for the company! even Cikgu Sunita kicks ass! much loves. ♥

can i have more of it, by the way? =/

as for now, i'm hungry. im'ma go get something to eat. slimming down is such a torture, seriously. i don't want to eat but, my bulging stomach's screaming for food pretty badly. i don't know which to please? my heart or, my pathetic appetite? help, anyone? sighs. 'til other times, lovelies. goodbye.

17th

2007-12-17T00:49:00.000+08:00

so, i'm officially single.

on this very day, 17th December 2007.

how now?

should i just... go on?

='(

ego's a disaster

2007-12-11T23:54:00.000+08:00

when things starts to turn out the way it wasn't supposed to, one just had to put one's ego aside.
i did that very thing, and our love's here to stay. ♥

let's just stick a pin to this, and never ever pull it off.
everything'll be just fine, in the end.

i promise.

it's civil war

2007-12-10T08:37:00.000+08:00

to whomever it may concern,
as being a very sensitive girl myself, i think that there's a need to express my feelings here(well at least, some of it -.-), just so that you'd understand more clearly about why i was ultimately upset with you then. also, deep down inside of me silently hope that these confessions will in turn make things right over whatever that had happened between us, quite recently. this is my blog, my say, my rule. so, peace and let's start getting on it.
first of all, i simply couldn't believe that you're the one who actually broke the ice, despite having absolutely nothing to be prepared for me initially(like for example: extra clothes/jacket/sweater/blazer etc.), if really you'd already have that in mind. it might be abrupt at that moment in time('cause we're just having fun blablabla...) you say but please, as a decent boyfriend, anyone will tend to at least THINK about it first before they actually do something, which in this case, is rather insensitive towards their girlfriend. so i guess, you should too. saying sorry right after is useless seriously, 'cause no matter what, it had already been done.
also, you say that i couldn't take jokes. jokes?! that's some kind of a joke to you? i supposed 'bully-ing' your girlfriend in front of like what, dozens of people seems such fun, aye? boy please, grow up! you're that proud to be an 18-years-old, so may i suggest you jolly well act like one. whatever it is, i admit, that i am so NOT into this kind of stuffs, never will and you, of all people, should know it very, very well by now. if you don't like me this way, then i am so sorry to say that i couldn't please you up to that extent, 'cause that's just the way i am. accept it or leave, that's all i'm saying. p/s: i repeat, I AM VERY SENSITIVE! so please, kindly do take note of that.
not forgetting, the fact that it was another unknown guy who offered me some tissue after all the massacre, and not you(who at that point of time was busily concentrating on the next victim to attack then) was such an ultimate disappointment! no, i am not at all proud(like you said) about it. instead, i was so sad, that... i am just too sad to function. it's only after you realised that there's another guy who's giving me some attention then that you started showing you care. or perhaps, you're just trying to make him jealous by showing yourself off as being my boyfriend? see, i don't even know what's your purpose either. when you sat beside me and tried to kissed me on my cheeks, you know i declined 'cause want to know why? i hated you pretty badly since. no offense, though.
this might just be another argument you think but actually, it does shows so much if you take it in a little deeper into thoughts. especially for girls, agreed?
going 2 years. -roll eyes- secretly, i question myself, "hakikatnya, apa ada pada angka?" 'cause honestly, i couldn't care less how long our relationship will be instead, i'd rather care about our attitude/love/care towards each other in order to make it last. that's what that matters, none others. ♥

it's been raining cats and dogs for days, hasn't it? goodness.

so yesterday was Erwan&Kalsom's auspicious day together! it's the day where they're legally(religious-wise) one, so to speak. fine, i'm crapping. although we had to endure the heavy downpour on our way there, it was pretty much worthwhile i should say. with great company, nothing will ever beat that, trust me. so Congratulations, to both of you, the newlyweds! you guys look so sweet together, seriously. see below;-

sweet kan?

SELAMAT PENGANTIN BARU!
semoga berkekalan hingga ke ~~anak cucu~~ akhir masa, insya'allah.
and buat anak cepat-cepat, kasi Aminah jaga, LOL!
meeeeesti best! =)

by the way, pardon my editting skills please. it's hideous, i know. thanks to Paint lah eh. sighs. anyways, a decent picture of them with us by their side will be up soon once i've received it from Aminah 'cause the picture's with her right now, alright? p/s: just so you know, the enormous red heart's function is to focus on the newlyweds, NOT others who surrounds them. lame but still, it's worth the efforts, i guess? =/

i wonder what's it like to be a bride someday. all eyes are definitely on you, right? will there be any sense of awkwardness, perhaps? i hope not. or maybe, nervous breakdown? god, i'll sweat like crazy i tell you if it comes to that. argh! i'm practically doomed.

so, on our way home, we camwhored.

and thus i conclude,

it's a need! a desire!

i've got to get one myself while i'm still working. word.

-----

MI HAD CALLED, LIKE FINALLY!
got to rush there by 4 tomorrow!
wish me tons of luck!
woohooooo!

i just thought they'd never. but, i guess i was wrong. Alhamdulillah, syukur.

-----

alright, my butt's aching right now. i've been spending hours and hours in front of this computer of mine due to editting pictures, blogging and etc. i'm just bored, that's all. and oh, civil war will only end if... i give in. otherwise, don't bother. thank you. so, 'til other times, goodbye.

the unexpecteds

2007-12-08T10:13:00.000+08:00

oh my god, it's been yet another 5 days of silence, hasn't it? -.-

don't get me wrong though. i had tons of things to write about in my head actually but, its just the fact of having too lazy to function fingers that always succeed getting in the way. -giggles- i simply couldn't be bothered nowadays you see and i secretly wonder why. oh wells, let's get started by summarising every memorable events that had happened recently in my life, since 04/12/2007 onwards(since that's when i actually stopped blogging for a while, pfft).

TUESDAY, DECEMBER 4, 2007

technically speaking, it's our 23rd months together so...
HAPPY
TWENTY-THIRD MONTHS
TOGETHER
BABY
!
and he did the sweetest thing ever, despite it being pretty mild i should say. he knows how much i yearn to watch this particular movie, STARDUST since forever but, we always haven't had the time to catch it together. furthermore, most of the cinemas had stopped showing it by the time thus i started giving up my hopes then. my baby, however, never gave up. he surprised me with STARDUST's last show to be shown in Singapore and that is at Cineleisure, 1815hr as a gift for me, for our 23rd months together. although i was dragged right after work, feeling extremely exhausted and all, i was pretty much satisfied and happy and grateful and oh -insertanypositivewordshere- with the gift. it really, truly does show his efforts(by doing researches and stuffs, so i've heard) just to make me happy on this day. thank you. ♥
just so you know, it's these littlest/random things that makes you feel so loved. it need not be at all extravagant or any of that sort, seriously.
also,
HAPPY 18TH BIRTHDAY, AMINAH!
you're much loved by me. good luck in your future endeavours and may all your wishes come true, alright? you're not going to be forever 18, aren't you? so apa lagi, enjoyyyyyyyyyy! -laughing out loud-

THURSDAY, DECEMBER 6, 2007

this is the day where i turn a year older, every single year. =)

aku dah tua lah...
ALAH EMAK! KAHWINKAN AKUUUUU!
-laughing out loud- eeeee, miang eh? tsk, tsk. this time around, Azri planned a rather simple, and private kind of celebration. we watched movies etc. although it wasn't perfect, i should say but still, i appreciate it a lot! thank you so, so much love! ♥
not forgetting, much thanks to those/others who wishes me as well which includes my parents, kakak maz, annie(my supervisor), aminah, juwairiyah, fifa, Sun Plaza's Coffee Bean peeps, sufian, nithiya, aisyah(my brother's girlfriend) etc. via anything, be it through SMS/Friendster or whatever. i just simply couldn't believe you guys'd remember, that's all. anyways, thank you all and i love you guys so, so much too.
i'm all-smiles, and ultimately grateful.

FRIDAY, DECEMBER 7, 2007

my Cavana peeps planned such a huge surprise for me! my jaw dropped turning me speechless instantly, and i was so touched undeniably. the cake was uber delicious, and everyone was there, even the ones who were in the morning shift earlier. thank you all so much! i really appreciate it a lot. and do trust me when i say this,
I ♥ CAVANA, Y'ALL!
walaupun sakit hati kan kerja sana, still they're the best company so far that i've ever worked with. the staffs at least, NOT the higher authority 'cause simply, they sucks.

and as for today, i was supposed to accompany my umi and my sister's family to Johor but, i guess i'd rather prefer spending time with my baby here in Singapore. such opportunity is indeed very rare, agreed? so, i think i should get ready for yet another great day ahead. can't wait.

cute right?! ♥

i want my baby to look like her. no, wait... my baby's going to be a little bit more prettier since she's going to be a mixture of mine and my future husband's genes. hmmmmm, siapalah agaknya eh? -wink2- i want Azri!

'till other times. have a productive day, please!

disfunctions

2007-12-03T23:15:00.000+08:00

and when my left brain has nothing right, while my right brain has nothing left, there's basically nothing i could possibly write about. so, pardon me. =(

a side note though, i simply can't get you out of my mind. just so you know, it's... pretty natural.

oh, this love.
♥ ♥ ♥

opinions

2007-12-02T11:27:00.000+08:00

my heart desires for only you.

i'm dead bored at home with absolutely nothing to do, just counting the hours before i actually have to go to work, though being at all hesitant about it. i think my umi's angry with me for some reason or another that i know nothing of(80%:- most probably, it's due to the fact that i lied to her about going to work yesterday but, i didn't and that she accidentally found out about it etc. oh wells, it's pretty normal i should say). truth is, i feel kind of guilty and am actually rather scared to ever face her again, for now at least. sighs. god umi, it's just a white lie... ='(

i browsed through blogskins minutes earlier and it was such a bore, honestly. almost none is of my interest lately. so, i guess i shall stick with my current skin a tad longer, i supposed since it couldn't be helped. moreover, bloghopping on the other hand, is killing me nowadays. none actually update as frequently as before. i'd loveeeee to know about what's currently going on in other people's life you see, and since via blogging is the easiest way to achieve that, i'm pretty much disappointed about it, no offense though. i felt as if i'm missing quite a lot and i hate that. even my baby's blog is bleahsssss, really. i always drop by, almost everytime undeniably but, i'm afraid, it upsets me a lot by doing so! i love him but this... it sucks. =( p/s: maybe, it's just me 'cause to others, it might not be that much big of a deal, you know. so, let's just take a chill pill, alright. peace.

have you ever wondered, what's it like to be a spoilt/rich bitch? i did, and honestly, i think that they lead a sad, sad life. though being gifted a barbie-like kind of world, where you've got almost everything and that your life's perfect in any way but frankly speaking, love and comfort's definitely lacking. yes, money can buy almost everything people say but money is also, the root of all evil. if you accidentallly picked the wrong path in life, being rich would be the last you could ever dream of, scary but true. in fact socially, you think everyone likes/adores you but sadly, they'll hate you, most probably due to pure jealousy. that is just so sad 'cause you'll think you have friends whom you think you could ever depend on but, they're not actually there, heart and soul for you. and not forgetting, love. you'll always feel insecure about whether your partner really loves you for you, or perhaps, for your luxurious life instead. it's even more sad, if you chose the least moral way ever, that is to do sex as and whenever with any guy possible you've encountered just to decide the truth about that fact. people keep calling you names, bitch/spoilt brat/whore/hoe etc., making decent guys being so afraid to even get this close to you, which indirectly leads you to only the bad ones that long for lust not, love. it'll be worst if you tend to be contented with this way of life. will you ever get married, decently? only god knows. such sad life, aye? i totally feel for these girls. i'm just lucky and thankful that i'm not one of them.

ordinary life is much, much loved! ♥

i don't know if i should go out early today and meet my baby first before i go to work. i'm just scared the same thing will happen again. plus, i'm too tired... and lazy. hee hee. but, i miss him a hell lot right now. guess, i'd call him now(he's probably still be sleeping at this hour, pfft). 'til other times. have a nice day!

farewell

2007-12-01T10:49:00.000+08:00

so, yesterday was a blessing(excludes the have-to-work part, though).

both are my ultimate sweethearts, for forever. ♥♥♥

farewell to Nora(Coffee Bean's favourite manager, so i've heard) i supposed for her last day yesterday. i've got to admit, it was pretty touching in one way or another. great food, great company, the party was a success. good luck in your future endeavours, and all of us will undeniably miss you, a lot! ♥

as for now, i've got to go for yet, another great day ahead. oooooh, can't wait!

water supply disruption

2007-11-30T10:07:00.000+08:00

ATTENTION!

there's going to be a water supply disruption alert, from 1400hr to 1600hr here in my block and strangely, i'm pretty upbeat about this. well whaddya` know, the idea of not having water for like that long(which is not really that long afterall) is kind of new to me so, yeah. i'm weird, i know. but for the record, my umi had the cheek to be sarcastic with me at this moment in time, where she's supposed to be intense by the way, saying(100% translated)...

so Azimah, if you 'want' to bathe, you better go and bathe now, i tell you before the disruption starts 'again', once in every 2 days, according to your time.

HA-HA! thanks eh for the humour this early of the day. IT'S THE JOKE OF THE YEAR! -smirk- i'm hurt.

and i still think that an aggregate of 294 for PSLE this year is ultimately unbelievable but yet, believable indeed. she had proven it anyways. i totally salute this Malay(i just had to emphasise this part) girl for her over-the-top achievement, making us all very proud. Congratulations!

i can't wait to meet my baby and off to my sister's! oh no wait, i got to bathe first, righttttt. -.-

such comfort

2007-11-29T20:32:00.000+08:00

just like a star across my sky, just like an angel off the page.
you have appeared to my life, feel like i'll never be the same.

i would die just to live, and yet we all live to die. weird, huh?

believe it or not, i've survived uncountable hours staring at my computer, haven't eaten anything yet since dawn arrives and my stomach keeps screaming, "I NEED FOOD!!!!!" in my ears, disturbing my peace. now that the sun's gone, still very hungry though but, who's to blame since i've no appetite at all myself. just a good, satisfying cup of Nescafe` seems pretty reasonable enough, i think.

my legs are straining very badly from all of the workout yesterday(at Khatib's gym, if you must know) but i supposed, it ain't as bad as Azri's. he's been complaining and i just can't help it but, to laugh silently in my heart. don't get it wrong, though. i really am sympathetic but, to think that he can't even afford to go to work today. -laughing out loud- we really should go there more often, shall we?

despite all those, however, my baby still has the cheek to call, ~~asking~~ pleading me to run away from work tomorrow with him for yet, another date. it does make me smile for a while but, sadly i couldn't. my schedule's fixed and it's rather risky to have it changed at the last minute. either i would have to face the *&^%$#@!~ music or, i'll feel guilty myself which indirectly lead to an uncomfortable date in the end. i wouldn't want to ruin it, really. plus, i haven't any $$$ so... harap faham. =)

awww, i miss this cutie. ♥♥♥

i'm going to my sister's house tomorrow for sure. so baby, want to tag along? eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, hendak sahajeeeeeeeeee. -laughing out loud- oh my god, i'm such a helpless nerd nowadays. 8) by the way people, just fyi, my lil` brother simply couldn't stop laughing watching me, typing away this post of mine. -.-, weirdo!

oh god, i think i ~~want~~ have to eat since i need the energy for tomorrow(hellooooo, work?!) you see so, goodbye now! stop grumbling stupid stomach! for once, help me feel thin! urgh!

atrocious

2007-11-27T20:12:00.000+08:00

so, you asked, "how's your day today?"

well, let's see... worklife's been stealing my freedom way away from me, my family sucks to the deepest core at this very moment in time, social life is a little too mundane to even care about, moreover talk about it -.-, i'm tired of waiting for my education-related calls and i barked at my baby... yet again, over the most stupid/unnecessary things ever existed in this world. god, am i seriously haywired!

therefore, to summarise, today's atrocious for me, thank you.

♥

p/s: i hope you know that i don't really mean it. so, i guess this's my sorry. i love you, and you know it. please, forgive me. ='(

you're my sweetest sin

2007-11-26T23:08:00.000+08:00

i was kind of hoping that i could turn back time with such ease and change everything but, that's almost impossible as we all know it. pfft. oh god, why is life such a pain in my ass?

boy, all i ever want is you.

oh, screw these insecurities pleaseeeee. it's driving me nuts all over. yesterday's yesterday and now, attention?! like, what the *&^%$#@!~ ! nope, i am so NOT pms-ing, just so you know. it's just... you. i want you, whenever, wherever. i want your eyes only on me, and not others, be it whoever. i long for your surprises, endless care, concerns and etc. god, you're driving me crrrrrazy, without even knowing about it! there's just this sudden craving/need for you, and only you. i can't control it, really. i simply couldn't. goodness, i think i'm desperate!

HELP A.S.A.P, ANYONE?!

p/s: maybe, just maybe, that i love you a tad too much. is it so wrong, at all? if its not, then why is it this difficult to handle?

functions

2007-11-24T09:24:00.000+08:00

the first thing i did when i woke up this morning was to scratch this blank head of mine like, what the hell. i certainly have no objectives or purpose of living for the day which seems, very weird... 'cause my everyday ain't supposed to be like this. it should be full of visions/creativity/wants&needs. i'm afraid, today's going to be a dull one(most probably, not definitely!) and i am so not looking forward to it. =(

thanks eh Cavana for trying to make me work another extra hour, WITHOUT any incentives offered, as expected. you're damn lucky i have a good heart, i tell you! for god's sake, let them chance upon my blog at least once in their lifetime. for sure they'll know how i feel so 'appreciated' there. **** _____ people! *&^%$#@!~

and these Chinese Community from don't-know-what organisation, celebrating something at the nearby court, couldn't be more noisy/annoying/irritating please! with their antique Chinese songs playing oh, so loudly etc. god! pakkal sahaja aku hidup dalam negeri Cina lah, betul! i want to migrate someday... to Indonesia, LMAO. i'll be a millionaire for sure, mind you!

okay, i'm starting to blabber pretty nothings here so, i shall stop. have a good day lovelies, although i'm rather unsure about mine. oh wells.

28/11/2007

i'll be waiting, patiently. ♥

skin-ing

2007-11-22T20:39:00.000+08:00

is it cool or what?!

so, i designed this skin all by myself(although i did use miss detonatedlove♥'s base codes -_-", much thanks for that anyways). it's my dream skin, as in a one-page skin thingy(where there's no scrolling down of whatever sort on its main body)! oh wells, does it really matter? -shrugs- goodness, azimah... tsk tsk tsk. my baby's new skin is oh so awesome too, really! take a look:- babylove's.

i have to say this, despite having a WW-3 yesterday(under my block), from 1845 to 2145 long hours, we're just still sooooo in love, lalalalalaloveeeee with each other. -hugs&kisses- to eternity, baby, we'll make it through.

euphoric

2007-11-20T20:34:00.000+08:00

be optimistic.

wow! yet again, it's been another 5 days. -shakes head-

don't get it wrong though 'cause honestly, everything's going on just fine. be it anything;- family, friends, relationship, money issues or self esteem-wise etc. in fact, i've got tons of things to write about like for example, we had a fabulous day of lying our asses off just to get away from our hectic workplace yesterday, for an unforgettable date with alternate slippers to walk on('cause we exchanged with each other, just for the fun of it) the whole entire day without feeling shameful of it. sure, everyone did looked but, who cares anyways. not forgetting the fact that i've been awfully sick lately, and still is, just so you know. and also, about me giving away as many cheeseballs as possible to whomever i know for free, LOL. heck, i'm getting out of there sooner or later so, i might as well make full 'use' out of it, am i right? sadly, my beloved Azri is an exception to the advantage though or it'll be too obvious(since they'll definitely spy on me whenever Azri came around Cavana). really... i swear. therefore, to my beloved Azri, I AM ULTIMATELY SORRY! =(

so, Anna called, out of the blue, urging me to register for PAE this Thursday. god Anna, i would love to get it over with as sooner as possible but, problem is, i've got to work. if you're reading this, will Friday be fine? sorry to trouble you. i do hope you'd understand.

this news was kind of old i supposed(it's been days, so...) but, oh bother.

I'M SO HAPPY TO RECEIVE MY FIRST

JEMPUTAN INVITATION EVER!

Congratulations kakak Kalsom(Wati) Binte Yousop, or in other words, Aminah's sister! heard that the ceremony's going to be held on the 9th of December, if i'm not mistaken, and word, i am so going to be there. 'cause you know, it's been eons since we last met, don't you think so? i just hope that everything'll be of smooth-sailing 'til the actual auspicious day arrives. 'til then. p/s: to Aminah, if you're reading this, i guess i'll send you an e-mail with my full address on it whenever so, you could just send the invitation card straight to me. kalau nak tunggu kita meet-up, alamatnya macam nak tunggu buah durian runtuh gitu, betul tak? masing-masing sibuk, apa nak buattttt. -giggles-

and so, i've been wondering, is Angelina Jolie that perfect as of that movie? honestly, i don't think so 'cause... i do have my reasons. -jealousssss- anyways, she's just another human being. in fact, it's animated so... booooo sama dia! LMAO. okay fine, i'm being so ridiculous. pfft. hey, as i'm writing, i just realised that, we're lacking of our pictures taken together. should have more of it, in the future. no wait! it's a MUST, A.S.A.P!

thank goodness it's pouring now. i needed it this much, really. it adds to the mood, if you know what i mean. i can't wait for Azri's fusilli and i've yet to exercise my night off to bed. superrrrrrrrrr lazyyyyyyyyyy lahhhhhhhhhh.

have a good night, lovelies!♥

so, assumption kills?

2007-11-15T11:29:00.000+08:00

guess i'll be rotting at home today. fun eh? -_-"

and i keep questioning myself, "why?!"

to you now, here it goes...

why must we have the same argument, over and over again? don't you even realise it, not a single bit at all? you said we were meant for each other, that we understand each other effortlessly, and that 1 year 10 months thus far means so much more than just love itself so, why all the feuding... almost every time over the littlest of things? you think that assumptions is the mother of all fucked ups(pardon me, please) between us but the problem is boy, i am so NOT assuming stuffs. i'm basically stating an actual fact so, you might jolly well stop denying it thus making yourself look so ridiculous in my eyes.

seriously, i don't need all these rubbish(thanks but, no thanks to you) in my life.

i need... a good day's rest. goodbye now.

littlest things

2007-11-14T20:21:00.000+08:00

and i keep singing...

"
you make me so hot, make me wanna drop.
you're so ridiculous, i can barely stop.
i can hardly breathe, you make me wanna scream.
you're so fabulous, you're so good to me baby, baby.

you're so good to me, baby.

♥♥♥

it's just strange the way i feel that whenever i'm with you, i just don't want to. but each and every time we're apart, i long for your presence. like now, for instance. i kept thinking about nothing else but, you. the thought of you has been occupying my mind since... when i first step into my house after a long day of work, with you waving goodbye to me by the staircase. i guess i kind of miss you, despite of everything. ='(

will you?

perhaps, once i'm in, i just can't get out as simply as what others might thought it will be. they're pestering me for a decision, just for the sake of my happiness but, i'm afraid, i'll stick with him through whatever. though it bothers me, quite a lot, i just had to have faith and i've got to believe. i simply can't deny the fact that he's the major source of my happiness. it might sound ridiculous but, so true. i'll prove all of them wrong. ALL of them, word.

no offense here(especially to Aiman) but,
SOME GIRLS JUST DON'T THINK! enough said.

just remember, good girls get good guys, as well as otherwise. i know it's hard but, i think it's better if you'd just move on. don't linger over such person, thus suffer... alone. i know, you know, that this is indeed the painful truth. hang on there, 'cause it's not the end of the world afterall. =)

school matters however, i'll enrol by the end of this month. much thanks Anna and James for the help. i really appreciate it a lot. i so love you guys. and i think i'm ready, for whatever it takes 'cause honestly speaking, i can't waittttt! ♥

Britney's BLACKOUT is awesomeeeee! it's worth grabbing, mind you.

and last but, not least... all hail to this proper post! it's been ~~so long~~ quite a while, don't you think? -bigggggggggg smileeeeeeeeee-

straightjacket feelings

2007-11-14T00:18:00.000+08:00

as usual, you confused me.

rainbows

2007-11-13T00:13:00.000+08:00

and we actually played HOPSCOTCH together. weird? -laughing out loud- we're so deprived of our childhood i guess, sighs.

it was lots of fun, though! i would love to have moreeeee, especially with you.

it's funny why Zac Effron's BET ON IT has been playing repeatedly on my media player countless times since, i don't know when exactly. is it just another co-incidence or... something else? perhaps, it's something to help boost my self-confidence though indirectly, i don't know. i did tell you that it's lacking, right? oh wells, it doesn't really matter anyways. -_-"

i'm dead bored at home, as well as my workplace. lately, i have no mood for almost everything(good example: blogging, as you can see for yourself). going out with my baby is an exception, just so you know. and i've been spending, quite a lot. that's the only thing that could make me happy for the time being. it's bad, i know but simply couldn't help it.

now, i've got to restrain myself from spending any more $$$ or, my account balance will be left with absolutely nothing pretty soon. i need some kind of stop-shopping-habits therapy or something. help, anyone? =/

screw life now. i'm hoping for a better year by next ~~January~~ February/March/April(not too sure either). can't wait!

p/s: i'm loving Shayne Ward's version of SOMEWHERE OVER THE RAINBOW. i simply adore his pitching/voice or whatever. =)

no worries 'cause, i got you

2007-11-08T22:15:00.000+08:00

i realised, since my blog's kind of dead now(yet again -_-"), my tagboard's dying too. -giggles- it really can't be helped, though. i've been working very hard lately to earn extra $$$, in order to fulfill some of my unnecessary cravings i supposed. hey, i'm just another girl, whaddya' expect?

pay day had past, and strangely, i'm pretty satisfied with it(since i only worked two weeks for the last month) =D. Alhamdulillah. it does pay to work hard, indeed. but i'm afraid, this satisfaction's not for long though, 'cause i've yet to reach my ultimate target(account balance-wise). sadly, it's still a long, long way to go... =(

and i guess i'm losing my confidence, bit by bit. is it due to my insecurities or imperfections etc? i don't know. i just hope it won't last 'cause alike others, i hate feeling (insertwhateverdepressingwordhere)! i love the way i used to be, and that is so unlike now. i'll try to change whatever back, for real? word.

i want/need a brand new me. =^

&then it's our 22nd

2007-11-04T09:58:00.000+08:00

hope is the thing with feathers, that perches in the soul.
and sings the tune without the words, and never stops at all.

and sweetest in the gale is heard, and sore must be the storm.
that could abash the little bird, that kept so many warm.

i've heard it in the chillest land, and on the strangest sea.
yet never, in extremity, it asked a crumb of me.

that's life.

i have a sickness, ~~pundi terturun~~(go figure!) but, i totally have no idea what to do about it =(.

i learnt, that women should've NEVER exercise too much/way out of their league. 'cause sadly, that's what i did, causing me to suffer as and whenever there's a need to _____. lately, i admit that i've been exercising vigorously, doing countless sit-ups, push-ups, crunches, jog-on-the-spot etc almost everyday. i even ran at least 1.2km(with Azri) quite recently despite knowing the fact that i've already had this ~~pundi terturun~~ or whatever it's called scientifically. all i know is, i've gained 2kg for the month and i've got to burn it all off! i hate feeling fat, and that's that. no worries 'cause i'll stop(promise!) once i reached my ideal(well, at least i think it is) weight. though my heart/head is as sturdy as a rock but, i do have some discipline in me, you know =/.

cure?: see doctor(which means, $30 gone just like that, pfft) or massage at that area(ewwwww!). so, which? -big sighs-

-----

and oh, today's 4th November 2007 so...

we've gone through heavenly wonders, and even stormy tides together but, nothing could stop us from reaching any further possibilities ahead of us. we learn from our past mistakes, move on and shall never halt.

i thank Allah that all this while, it has always been you. no one else. he'd given me 1 year 10 months thus far of your safest protection, endless love/care/devotion and incomparable warmth that i couldn't be more satisfied/thankful enough, really. i've always believed that He knows best, therefore i knew you're made my guardian angel for a reason. i love you, i really truly do with all of my heart that no one else could ever stand a chance. i'm afraid i was born to love only you, percayalah.

i'm not proud to have our relationship stand this long, not at all. instead, i'll take it as a form of gratitude and a priceless reward of our hard work, loyalty towards each other and the understandings we share in order to keep it going on. if you think it's an awfully easy task, boy you're so, so wrong.

for every moment baby, you're leaving me breathless. you taught me a whole lot but, i don't know how much more i should thank you 'cause deep inside, i know that words/actions(or both) are never enough to explain how i really, truly feel.

there's no more turning backwards now, we vowed and i'll say, "oh, come whatever, 'cause we'll stay true together, for as long as it takes." =D

just promise me you'll colour my world, until the end of time baby and i'll be at peace for sure. i love you. -kisses-

-----

umi's away and i'm bored. i got to work my ass off for the next 3 months? i supposed due to one reason or another and i'm so sick of it. money issues, go away and never come back, pleaseeeee. urgh.

have a productive day, everyone, 'cause i'll sure to have mine =).

happy daze

2007-11-03T11:10:00.000+08:00

i'm off to meet my baby by 1200hr.

can't wait! =D

2007's raya

2007-11-02T13:43:00.000+08:00

okay fine, i know i'm very the miang, LOL. the actual reason as to why i'm back here in blogger again is mainly because i feel so, so lonely at LiveJournal(honestly!). though i can't deny the fact that LiveJournal's way cooler(in terms of how it's used) but, it's hardly to find my very own friends there, which indirectly causes me to be such a loner. =( unlike blogger, which is definitely more convenient without a doubt, everyone's using it(people i know, at least) and the layout's are of infinity times better as compared to that of LiveJournal's. plus, i kind of miss it. therefore, i would love to conclude that 3 weeks of Livejournal, is atrocious for me. =/

my main intention for blogging right now is to write about my recent raya outing with Azri's gang last Sunday, 28th October 2007 but Photobucket's ain't giving me any mercy, as expected. so, i guess i have to postpone this post until whenever, perhaps? as for now, i have to get ready for work. just another hour of slacking in my room, kill me! =S

do wait for my mass update! 'til later.

[//editted at 0107hr, 3rd November 2007]

awesomeeeee.

as promised, i just got back from work(i'll try to make this post as short and simple as possible 'cause i'm really very tired right now so, pardon me) and here i am typing away about my craziest/coolest raya outing for the year 2007 with none other than the usual bunch, Azri's gang. i was having lots of fun, undeniably. thanks lovelies for making my day then! =D

let's just let our pictures portray/do the talking as the famous saying goes, "pictures speaks a thousand words". enjoy...

we're youngsters who just want to have fun. =)

lose your breath, baby boy.

it's these random moments that makes it all complete.

i bet you can tell how much fun we had then just by looking at these pictures above. it's exactly like a reunion, really and i'd loveeeee to have more of it in the future. not forgetting, i learnt a lot too, just from this outing but, i think it's best if i keep it to myself or people will just judge/hate me for life, word. so, i think that's that i guess. this update ain't that massive i supposed, huh? oh, whatever.